Page 94 of A Different Impression

“I am certain I shall,” Mary replied. “I have looked forward to seeing the church almost as much as Pemberley itself.”

Winter light filtered dimly through the stained glass windows of the church whilst candles illuminated the chancel. The familiar words of prayer, the reading of the Nativity story, and the celebration of Holy Communion acquired greater meaning for Elizabeth as she sat beside William, surrounded by so many of those she loved.

During the responses, Elizabeth glanced along the pew at William and her sisters. The past year had changed all of them, not always gently, and difficulties still remained. For now, however, her sisters were together, her children were safe at Pemberley, and she was grateful for the family they were slowly rebuilding. That her parents were not there troubled her a little, but she was so surrounded by those who loved her that she could not help but feel satisfaction.

Upon returning to Pemberley, they found a substantial breakfast awaiting them. The remainder of the morning passed in games, conversation, and the exchange of a few modest gifts. When the twins were brought down, they received simple toys, several children’s books, and little gowns embroidered by the ladies.

A grand Christmas dinner was served early that evening and lasted more than three hours. Elizabeth enjoyed both the food and the conversation as everyone shared stories of former Christmases.

Elizabeth and William rose early the following morning to deliver baskets to their tenants, continuing the tradition they had revived the previous year. Each basket contained articles selected for the needs of the household, a few coins, and treats for the children. The warmth with which they were received made the cold journey worthwhile.

The following week passed pleasantly. A hunt occupied the gentlemen for two days and provided meat for several families upon the estate, whilst Elizabeth spent much of her time sewing and conversing with the other ladies. Having all four of her sisters together felt increasingly precious to her. Over the past year, Charlotte, Georgiana, and Anne had also become part of their circle, and Elizabeth enjoyed the hours they spent together in various groupings. The Gardiner children and the twins joined them for brief intervals when circumstances allowed.

Elizabeth made opportunities to speak privately with each of her sisters, paying particular attention to Mary and Lydia. She had already attempted several times to persuade Mary to remain at Pemberley rather than return to Longbourn, but Mary continued to insist that she was content there. At last, in a quiet corner away from the other guests, Elizabeth coaxed the true reason from her.

“I like Robert Goulding,” Mary blurted out. “And I believe he likes me as well. He has begun visiting Longbourn, and whilst he claims he has come to speak with Papa, he spends most of his time with me. We discuss the estate and books we have both read. He finished at Oxford in the spring and is now learning to manage his father’s estate, although his elder brother will inherit it.”

Elizabeth studied her sister in surprise. Curiosity quickly overtook it, but several practical concerns could not be ignored.

“Mary, I have no wish to discourage you, but Robert knows that you will not inherit Longbourn and that the estate is entailed to Mr Collins, does he not?” She hesitated before adding, “Nor have you mentioned to him the money you are investing with Uncle?”

“No, Lizzy.” Mary shook her head earnestly. “Uncle warned me not to speak of it to anyone, including our parents. Papa does not know how greatly I have reduced the estate’s expenses or how much the profits have increased. William’s suggestions, together with those of the steward, have allowed us to save a substantial portion of the profits, and Uncle Gardiner has invested the money for us.”

Her posture straightened as she spoke, and the pride in her accomplishment was unmistakable.

“It is not a great sum yet,” Mary continued, “but it is far more than Papa ever managed to save.”

“It is significant, Mary, and William and I are proud of what you have accomplished. You have managed exceedingly well with very little assistance from Papa.” Elizabeth reached for her hand. “How serious is your understanding with Robert?”

Mary looked towards the fire before answering. “He has asked for a courtship, and I told him I would give him my answer after Christmas. I wanted to discuss it with my sisters—particularly with you—before I agreed.”

“Do you love him? Or do you believe you could?”

Colour rose in Mary’s cheeks, and she lowered her gaze to their joined hands. Her fingers tightened around Elizabeth’s as she hesitated.

“I do like him very much,” she said at last. “He is exceedingly kind, and I believe he cares for me as well. He has not said so, but I can see it in the way he looks at me and treats me.”

She released Elizabeth’s hand and smoothed her skirts before continuing.

“A few days before I left for Pemberley, he told me that he intends to ask Uncle Gardiner’s advice about investing a small legacy left to him by his paternal grandfather. He did not speak directly of marriage, but I cannot imagine why else he would have mentioned it—or why he has begun hinting that he might purchase a small house nearby.” Mary glanced up, appearing to gauge Elizabeth’s reaction. “I wondered whether, if we married, we might remain at Longbourn instead. We could continue managing the estate together, and Robert has several ideas for increasing the profits.”

“Provided Papa agrees, I can see no objection,” Elizabeth replied. “You must remember, however, that he may withdraw from you once you are married, just as he did from me. Remaining beneath the same roof may make that especially difficult.”

Mary’s expression sobered. “I know, but I expect nothing better from him. I never believed Papa cared for me beyond what I could do for him. He never favoured me as he did you, and I have always known that I was merely someone to occupy him.”

The calm resignation with which she spoke pained Elizabeth more than anger might have done. She moved closer and embraced her sister.

“You deserve better than that, Mary.”

Mary returned the embrace before drawing away. When their conversation returned to Mr Goulding, some of the heaviness left her expression, replaced by an admiration she made little effort to conceal. Despite her concerns about Longbourn and their father, Elizabeth could not help smiling.

They continued discussing Mr Goulding and the estate until a maid arrived to inform Elizabeth that the twins required her. Mary accompanied her to the nursery, but the presence of several others soon turned their conversation towards lighter subjects.

Later that day, Mrs Gardiner asked to speak privately with Elizabeth and Lydia. Once they were alone, Lydia admitted that she did not wish to return to school but feared that returning to Longbourn would place her once more under their mother’s influence.

“You may come to London with us,” Mrs Gardiner offered. “You will continue your education, but you will also learn more about managing a household and conducting yourself in society.”

Lydia looked towards Elizabeth. “I know you invited me to remain at Pemberley, Lizzy, but you already have Georgiana and Kitty here, along with the twins and so many others depending upon you. I think Aunt Gardiner’s plan would be better for me.”