Page 64 of Wicked Games

“You need your space too, so take it, if you need to. I’m good at being alone.”

“You’re not alone, not while we’re together. Come to me, anytime, for anything. If you want to talk or if you just want to sit. If you’re lonely and want to make love to remember that someone treasures you. I’ll give you whatever I have, and nothing will make me happier than if you take it.”

I grip his arms. “I can’t give you babies.”

“I know, and I have known. Avery, if that mattered, do you think I would’ve said what I just said? Darren was blind, and he was stupid. There are so many other ways to create a family, and he gave you none of those choices. It’s not where they come from . . . foster care, adoption . . . and you can make a difference loving kids who need a home. He was selfish and threw away the best thing that ever happened to him. You’re mine now, and that’s all that matters to me. If you ever decide you want kids, we’ll talk. I need time to heal after Theo, but I never thought I’d have someone with me while I do. I’m a lucky bastard and don’t you think for one second I’m going to take it for granted.”

“I’m going to need time to get used to that.”

“As long as you do. I need time too. Slow and easy, okay?”

“Yeah.”

The song ends, but we don’t move, his fingers twisted in my hair, the setting sun lighting his eyes and scruff covering his jaw. He’s tired, but he will be, until the weight of the past drops off him and he can learn to live with it in the deep corners of his heart. His son’s death and his broken marriage will always be with him, just like my failed marriage and Hattie’s murder, but as the years go on and we love each other, we can build new dreams over the nightmares.

“Do you want to get going?” he asks.

“Yeah, I suppose we better. We have Violet’s painting to carry back.”

“Why did you make me buy it?”

We walk toward the picnic table where my purse and candles are. “Because you’ve lost enough of your life already. When you have friends and people who care about you, never give them up. There’s room for everyone.”

“You’re right. Sometimes I forget that.”

“You didn’t forget. Brooke was jealous and didn’t remember. She decided to hate Violet instead of being friends with her, and that was her choice. We don’t need to talk about it anymore.”

He looks at me out of the corners of his eyes, not quite trusting me, or maybe thinking that once we’re back in the city and he goes to work with her every day that this subject will come up again. Maybe it will, but that’s something else we’ll need to take slow and easy.

The gentleman we bought the painting from wrapped it in bubble wrap and offers to give us a ride so we don’t have to carry it.

Gratefully, we accept, and we sit in the box of an old truck, the painting lying on our legs. He drops us off at Seth’s, and shaking hands, we tell him thanks and to have a good night.

Awkwardly, we stand in his driveway. This might be the way the rest of the summer goes, wondering how slow is too slow, or how close is too close. I don’t want to be in his face every second and I’m sure he’s thinking the same thing about me.

“If you have some work to do, I have plenty to keep me busy,” I say, the bag of candles hanging from the crook of my elbow.

“There are a few things I could take care of, but I told you I’m always here if you need me and I don’t want you to think I lied. If you want to come in, you should come in.”

“Well, I was thinking about taking a bath, and then maybe writing a bit. We could do something tomorrow. The weather forecast says it’s supposed to be hot. We could go out on one of the boats.”

“How about the beach? Since you already have a cooler?” he asks, teasing.

“Yeah, we could do that. I’ll make us lunch.”

“Pick you up about noon?” He leans the painting against his truck’s wheel. It’s heavy and I’m sure he wants to bring it inside.

“Yeah, I’ll be ready.”

With his hand on the nape of my neck, he nudges me closer, his brown eyes smoky. “Why don’t you tell me, because technically, you didn’t at the park, and I want to hear it.”

I push back a smile. I haven’t been romanced in years and I’m going to love every second of it. “Tell you what?”

“I think you know.” He traces my lips with his finger, and shivers run up and down my spine. “I need your pretty mouth to say it.”

“I love you, Seth. Is that what you meant?”

He sighs. “Fuck. Yeah, that’s what I meant. I’m never going to get tired of hearing you say that. Be careful, okay? If you need anything, call. I’m only a few hundred feet away.”