Page 169 of Marcello

It was a castle straight out of one of the fairy tales Mama used to read me when I was little –

But it was a prison nonetheless.

Oh – and I was born into the mafia. The Cosa Nostra, specifically.

That was its own form of prison, too… just one I couldn’t see.

Although, as I found out, it was the worse of the two by far.

I was a surprise baby. Mama had fertility complications after the birth of her third child. She and Papa tried for years. Drugs, IVF – nothing worked, so they stopped trying.

A few years later, I came along.

Surprise!

I was 17 years younger than my brother Luciano. My earliest memory of him was as he was moving out of the castle when I was four. I remember being sad.

My best memory of him was when I was in his wedding at age six. I was the flower girl.

He was really sweet to me that day. So was his wife, Francesca.

During the reception, Papa told me that in his line of work, he had to grant people’s wishes on a daughter’s wedding day. But since I wouldn’t get married for years, he would grant me – and me alone! – one wish on Luciano’s wedding day.

“What do you wish for?” he asked.

“A baby brother or sister!”

He smiled sadly. Mama turned her head away, she was so overcome with emotion.

“I’m sorry, my darling,” Papa said. “That’s the one wish I might not be able to grant.”

I was devastated – until Luciano spoke up. “Hey, Laura – I might be able to help. Would a little cousin do?”

“A cousin would be great!” I exclaimed.

Two years later, Ezio was born. I loved him. He was like a real-life baby doll! I couldn’t get enough of holding him and pretending he was mine.

Three years after that, Fiorella came along, and then Maristella. I loved them, too – although by then I was older, and wasn’t quite as enthusiastic. Although putting Fiorella in frilly dresses was a lot of fun.

One thing I didn’t understand: Luciano, Francesca, and their children always came to the castle, and we never went over to their house.

Which meant they could move around freely.

They got to go into the outside world.

Once I figured it out (I was nine at the time), I REALLY resented it.

I wanted to go to the beach!

I wanted to go to the mountains and see snow!

I wanted to go to a shopping mall – a toy store – Disneyland!

“No,” my father flatly refused.

“Why not?!” I demanded in tears.

“Because I said so.”