Page 121 of How To Not Need You

“Want to tell me why?”

“You know why.”

“I think I know why.”

“Then why did you ask?”

Dad opens his mouth. Closes it. I take another bite of toast. I win.

This morning is THE WORST! Dad does my hair wrong. I tell him twice that it’s bumpy at the back. He fixes it. It’s still bumpy. I tell him again. He fixes it again. Now it’s worse.

I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror. Liv does my hair better. I don’t say that because Dad already looks sad. I’m mad at him. I don’t want him to be more sad though.

“Looks good,” Dad says.

I look at him in the mirror. “It’s crooked.”

“It is not.”

I turn my head to show him.

He looks where I am pointing. “Okay. A little.”

“A lot.”

“A little.”

“A lot.”

He sighs. “Do you want me to start again?”

“No. We’ll be late.”

Dad stares at me again with his scrunchy face.

“What?”

“Nothing.” He does a tiny smile. I don't smile back. Mostly.

Dad holds my hand when we cross the school car park. I let him. Being mad doesn’t mean I want to get hit by a car.

When we get to my classroom, Mrs Chen is standing near the door. She smiles when she sees me.

“Morning, Tilly.”

“Morning.”

Dad lets go of my hand and crouches in front of me.

“Have a good day, Bug.”

“Okay.”

“And be good.”

I frown at him. “I’m always good.”

Mrs Chen laughs. I don’t know why. I am. Dad opens his arms. I stare at him. I’m still mad. Really mad. But he’s still my dad. So I step forward and let him hug me.