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He shrugged. “I’d be in a cemetery if not for him. And blood or not, he’s my family.”
I leaned over and kissed his cheek, a good-bye. “Thanks, Pike. He’s lucky to have you in his life.”
He pushed away from the doorjamb, his expression resigned. “Want me to tell him you stopped by?”
Though part of me had wanted to say yes, I’d shaken my head no and walked away. If I wasn’t going to stay, then it wasn’t fair for me to keep dragging this along. For Foster or myself. Even if I figured out some way not to leave, how could I begin to be what Foster wanted? I was intrigued by the glimpses of his dominant side I’d seen, enjoyed fantasies that went down that path. But the idea of giving that much control to anyone made my skin go clammy. I’d barely escaped from beneath my father’s thumb. How could I consider being under someone else’s?
So if Foster was at that resort place, looking for some other woman to be in that type of relationship with him, then I shouldn’t begrudge him that. He deserved to be happy, even if I wasn’t the one making him that way.
Well, at least that’s what I’d been trying to tell myself during the car ride.
But when visions of another woman touching him came to mind, completely unfounded territorial feelings rose to the surface, darkening my mood. For someone who was supposedly looking for something real, Foster certainly was going about it an interesting way. I didn’t know a lot about his lifestyle, but looking for Mrs. Right at a sex resort didn’t sound so romantic. And if he’d really felt anything toward me like he’d implied the other night, he’d gotten over it mighty fast.
I merged into traffic, gripping the steering wheel a bit too hard and cursing the ballad that was playing on the radio. Stupid frigging song. But before my thoughts could careen further down the destructive path they were on, the notes of my phone’s ringtone filtered through the music. I lowered my radio and hit the Speaker button on the phone. “Hello?”
“Marcela,” my dad said, his heavy accent making my name sound so much more exotic. “I finally caught you. I’ve been trying to call.”
“Hey, Papá,” I said, trying to muster up an apologetic tone through my clenched teeth. “Sorry, I’ve been busy getting ready for the move.” And having threesomes. And getting chained to doors. And maybe falling for some guy who likes to torture women for kicks.
“You make me worry, Cela. I had to call your brother to make sure he’d heard from you.”
I sighed. “I’m sorry, but you shouldn’t worry so much. I’m not nine. I can survive a few days without being checked on.”
“Don’t be smart,” he said, using that father tone that used to make me want to hide in my room. “But never mind, it won’t matter soon. You’ll be home. We have the house all ready for you. I’ll be able to see your car from across the street and will sleep easy knowing you’re safe.”
“Wait, what?” My stomach did a nauseous roll as I tried not to look down at my phone in horror.
“Your tía was only renting that house from me. I told you that. She wanted to move closer into town, so we’re going to let you stay there. Think of all the money you’ll save. You’ll only have to cover the utilities. You can start your retirement fund early.”
“You want me to live across the street?” I asked, unable to keep the what the hell? out of my tone. “I’ve already put a deposit down on an apartment.”
“Now, Marcela, don’t be ungrateful. And it’s just a deposit. Let them have it. You’re going to be working at the clinic with me, so you might as well be close by. We can even save gas and ride together. And believe me, I can’t wait to have your help. I’ve had to hire an extra tech just to handle the patient load. And your mamá is buzzing around like she’s got a bee up her dress. She’ll be so happy to have you back.”
Cars whizzed by me on each side as the world seemed to slow inside my car. My father continued to ramble on, and a movie of my life started to play in my head. I’d known I was going back and would be around my family again, but the picture my father was painting was like a thick, itchy blanket covering me. Smothering.
“Papá, I don’t think living so close is a good idea. I need my space.”
“Space? You’ll have a whole house to yourself,” he said, then muttered something in Spanish, which meant he was getting annoyed. “You know how many children would love to have their family pay for their mortgage? We want to take care of you, Cela.”
I breathed in through my nose, trying to stay focused on the
road and not letting myself completely lose my shit in the car. I loved my father, but the urge to scream, shout, and curse at him was pounding through me. I’d thought with the last few years of my being gone, my parents would’ve loosened their grip a little bit. But it sounded like they’d only been lying in wait until I came home to resume their control over my life.
I pulled at my necklace, the jewelry suddenly too snug.
“I have to go. We can talk about this later,” I said in a rush, my instincts going into cornered-rabbit mode. “I’m visiting Andre tonight and I don’t want to be late.”
My father grunted. “Fine. But we’re not done with this conversation. And tell your brother to call me. I want him to ride down with you when you come home. It’s been far too long since he’s visited his family.”
I wanted to ask him if I should invite Luz, too. My older sister only lived a town over from my parents. But I knew what my dad’s answer would be. Forgiveness was one gift my father never granted. Being cut out of the family was a permanent condition. My sister’s name wasn’t even spoken anymore.
And as I pulled in front of Andre’s building, I wondered what my father would do if he knew what I’d done with Foster and Pike . . . or if I refused to live in the house he’d offered me, changed the blueprint of my life.
Would I be discarded, too?
With a deep sigh, I grabbed the small gift I’d bought for Jace’s brother, Wyatt, and climbed out of the car. By the time I made my way to the loft on the third floor, I was praying this party had alcohol, because I had a feeling a nervous breakdown was waiting in the wings for me otherwise. One more crappy thing tonight, and I was going to lose it.
I knocked on the door, and it swung open a minute later, the space filling with the imposing force that was Jace Austin. Andre’s roommate grinned wide, his green eyes lit with the kind of jovial ease I longed for. “Well, if it isn’t the prettier Medina.”
