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Abilene shook her head. “No, thank you. I think I have plenty,” she paused to glare at me, “right here.”
With a final chuckle and another pat on the back, Mrs. H left us alone.
I made eye contact with Abilene then and hardened my expression. “I want you to be honest with me. Do you really feel like the baby is okay? This isn’t a time to be tough or to try to protect my feelings. I want the truth.”
She sat up and took hold of my hand. “I would never let anything bad happen to our child. You need to have faith in that. Everything is okay. I promise.”
Satisfied with her answer and finding comfort in the soothing way she delivered the message that I needed to chill the fuck out, I stood and reached for the blankets to tuck her into bed.
“It’s been a long night,” I said. “I’m sure you need your rest.”
“Wait.” She didn’t release my hand. “Can you… come be with me? I could really use…” She swallowed hard, her eyes diverted, but then refocused on me. “Could you hold me until I fall asleep? Please?”
I don’t think I could have stripped down and crawled into bed fast enough. I needed to hold her and was happy she also wanted that. I didn’t want to push too fast or too hard even though I really couldn’t help myself in that matter. But I needed to hold her.
And as I took her into my arms and rested my hand on her belly… I realized I needed to hold the baby too. It was all truly sinking in. I was going to be a father.
Abilene pressed her body into me in the perfect spoon. “We’re going to be all right,” she said softly. “We’re so close to the end. I’m sure we only have a couple of Trials to go, and this will all be over. We can walk out of here with everything we both ever wanted.”
I took a deep breath and inhaled the flowery essence of her hair. My dick was hard because it had a mind of its own, but I had no true desire to fuck her. I just wanted to hold her, hold my baby, and be as one.
“Beau?” she asked sleepily with a yawn.
“Yes?” I kissed her head and squeezed her to me even more. I had this overwhelming need to protect and didn’t want her even an inch away from me.
“My life has always involved lies. I want to change that. I don’t want to lie again. I don’t want this baby to have to hustle. I want so much more for them.”
I kissed her head again. “I know. And don’t worry. I believe you about the baby. The baby will have the best. Never doubt that. We don’t need to discuss this any further.”
“I know you say that, and I know you think you—”
“Shh,” I interrupted. “You need your rest. We both do. I think we’ve talked enough for one night. Sleep.”
She released a breath and placed her palm over mine that rested on her stomach.
No more words.
Just us. Just the three of us.
15
Abilene
Things settled into a bit of a rhythm over the next few weeks. Beau worked and I read books and watched old movies on the TV Mrs. H got me at Beau’s request. I loved the glamour of old Hollywood and could lose long afternoons watching Gene Kelly movies. I’d also watched almost the entire Hitchcock catalogue.
“What do you even like about these old movies?” Beau asked as he closed his laptop at the end of another endless day.
I looked up from where I’d been laid out on the floor on my side, eating popcorn and laughing my ass off at one of the amazing singing and dance numbers in Singin’ in the Rain.
I grabbed the remote and rewound. “Are you kidding? Watch this. Donald O’Connor does a running wall flip. No special effects, he’s just a badass.”
I played the movie forward, laughing in astonishment when the young Donald O’Connor pulled off the amazing feat, running at the wall and then flipping over with the ease of any modern parkour star.
I grinned as I looked from the screen back to Beau. “Badass, right?”
There was a smile on his face, but he wasn’t looking at the screen. “Badass indeed,” he said quietly.
I swallowed and sat up from my laid out stance on the plush floor rug. “So, um.” I licked my fingertips free of salty butter, a movement which did not go unnoticed by Beau. His eyes zeroed in on my lips as I licked each finger.
Oh shit, that was hot. I pulled my last finger from my mouth with a little pop and felt my cheeks heat.
I looked Beau up and down. Everything had been so different the past few weeks. He’d been so… attentive. I imagined he was driving Mrs. H nuts with his insistence on overhauling the menu, but she’d risen to the task. She made me green smoothies for breakfast every morning, and just this past week the nausea had been slowly settling down.
