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FIRSTS
KAL
After dinner, he drove us out of the city. To this park in Rosenberg where the lack of streetlights makes it possible to see the stars.
“You remembered,” I whisper. My heart is so full it could burst.
“Yeah… I did. You wait until the sun finishes setting… it’s beautiful here,” he says and wraps an arm around me to pull me close. It is beautiful here. The truck is running and “Your Body is a Wonderland” by John Mayer is playing on repeat.
If I’m honest, I’ve never loved Houston. Rivers Wilde and all its quaint suburban perfection is the first place I’ve lived that I could imagine myself staying. Before we moved there, I couldn’t wait until I was old enough to go live somewhere glamorous. Maybe Paris. Wherever it is, I need to be able to see the stars.
“Thank you so much. This is perfect.”
“I have one more thing.” He sits up and reaches behind him to pull out the brown paper-wrapped package I’d seen him slide into the truck with us.
“You’ve spoiled me so much.” I nod at the bouquet of flowers laying by my side.
“Those are nothing.” He nods at me to open the package. I sit up and unwrap it taking my time not to tear the paper. I plan on keeping it.
“Oh.” My breath catches in my throat and I run unsteady fingers over the dust cover of the book. Where the Side Walk Ends.
“It’s signed by the author,” he says and I press it to my chest as if I can hold back the bursting dam of happiness inside of me. If I couldn’t hear the music, and feel the breeze and see the stars, I might think I was dreaming.
“This is… oh, I’ll treasure it. Thank you so much.”
“You’re so welcome.” And then he gives me the best present of all.
The flowers were beautiful. This book is beyond precious. But nothing compares to Remi’s smile. It lights up his entire face. The star of the show, wide, full, dimpled and sincere—it steals my breath. And he had the most perfect teeth I’d ever seen on a guy.
I am so smitten. This summer we’ve spent together has been full of firsts.
He’s the first boy to hold my hand.
The first boy to give me a present just to see me smile.
He’s the first boy to hold a door open for me.
He was the first boy to kiss me like my kisses were the only thing keeping him alive.
And tonight, I’ll ask him to be my first lover.
If he’ll have me.
I’ve stopped holding him at arm’s length, but he’s never tried to take us further than making out.
I suspect it’s because his whole life is about to take off in a way that doesn’t include me. The thought causes an ache in the middle of my chest, but I push it away. Not tonight on the most perfect day. With my dream man lying next to me under the sky that reminds me of his eyes.
I’m going to give him my virginity. He may go away and never think about me again, but I know he’ll give me a “first time” worth remembering. With someone who looks at me like I hung the moon. Who makes me laugh. Who helps me believe that all of my secret dreams are actually possible. I’ll never forget him.
I sigh into his shirt and tip my head up to look at him.
His eyes are flooded with the last light from the sun that’s dropped from its high perch in the sky. It’s going to start to set soon. I want to lie out here with him all night and see the sun rise again. “I want today to never end,” I say wistfully.
His smiles spreads and the fingers that have been twirling in my hair move to my cheeks and start to write a word, letter by letter on it.
“It’s been a pretty perfect day,” he says as he strokes out a M on my cheek.
I giggle at the tickle and squirm against his side. But as soon as my thighs brush his, my giggle dies and my squirm becomes more languorous. His body feels so good.
