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“You look just like her. But, where have you been?”
“He looks just like who?” I demand.
“Carter’s biological mother, Sasha. Who worked for us until a couple years before you were born,” Phil explains, in far too calm a voice.
“Your dad had an affair with the lady. I thought she was his sister.” I direct the question at Carter, but he doesn’t seem to hear me.
Phil pipes up. “Sasha was his father’s sister.” He points at Carter. And his mistress.” He points at my father and doesn’t look away. “She got pregnant and ran off to save her son from being raised by the evil Wolfes.”
“What does that even mean?”
I peer at Phil, seeing him now without the filter of lies, secrets, and deceit. That cleft in his chin, I ran my finger over one identical to it just this evening. The world comes to a screeching halt. I grasp the chair closest to me but otherwise don’t move.
Oh my God… Carter.
My ears start to ring.
“This is a lie,” Carter groans. “Of course it is.” I hurl the words with confidence that is entirely feigned. Inside, I feel as if a fundamental piece of myself has gone rogue and is trying to destroy me. I close my eyes against a surge of dizziness.
“Oh, it’s not a lie. And it’s going to cost him his governorship.” Phil says with the voice of a man who is enjoying his enemies’ bloody defeat.
“You have no proof.” There’s a tremor in my father’s voice. He looks like he aged a thousand years in just a few minutes.
Phil walks up to him. ”But we’ll get it and then all your chickens will come home to roost.”
As the implications of what he’s saying start to sink in, my legs give way. I sit in the chair I’ve been using for support and press one of the linens to my mouth.
And then, I start to scream. It’s full of anguish and rage and disgust. I shudder as it washes over me, burning me from the inside out. It uses all of my oxygen and in seconds I’m light-headed. I hear the sound of my name being called, but it’s very far away.
Carter is my father’s son.
Carter is my brother.
And I am ruined.
39
Carter
Not Real
“On my way.” Beth’s text flashes on my phone, and I immediately start to panic. My palms are sweaty, trepidation thunders through me like an out of control locomotive and my heart drums like it’s tied to the tracks.
I am not ready for this conversation.
Or any conversation. I’m sleep-deprived, starving, thirsty, and in a fucking dangerous mood. The unbearable suspense has made the last few days an endless nightmare.
That Andrew Wolfe could be my father is a reality that I find incomprehensible.
I’ve refused to let myself believe it.
It was just…it couldn’t be.
Beth, the woman I love, the woman I want, can’t be my sister. We would know…I would feel it. Wouldn’t I?
There has to be some biological switch that would have prevented this.
I spent weeks spaced the fuck out. I couldn’t think. Everything I thought about my life was a lie. I don’t know how I’m going to tell Penn. I’m sure she has no clue. My father lied to all of us. Damn him.
