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The audience erupts in cheers and my heart soars, as does my voice.
“No matter what you’ve done, or what mistakes you’ve made, you’ve got something beautiful inside of you that’s worth knowing. It’s my mission to shed light on the dark places where beautiful things are hidden.” I smile out at the faceless sea of people whose energy is carrying me right now.
“I know that seeing a different version of yourself can change the entire trajectory of your life. And so I send my paintings with the hope that seeing their beautiful dreams staring back at them will give them wings. I’m not saying you won’t stumble and fall flat on your ass. You absolutely will. But that’s not the end of your story and if dig deep, do the hard work, I promise it’ll be worth it. In closing, I want to remind you that you are not here by mistake. And in my eyes, you are glorious. Declare it, own it, and watch
the world bend to your will.”
I’m done, and I feel like I’ve run a marathon.
The room is silent and as it stretches, I start to worry that maybe I got carried away.
To my left, a loud wolf whistle pulls my eyes to the man who’s on his feet. My knees nearly give out and I have to lean against the podium to steady myself when I realize it’s Carter. .
He’s grinning from ear to ear and the man sitting next to him stands, lets out that whistle again, and starts to clap.
The rest of the audience wakes up from whatever trance they were in and join him on their feet.
I don’t hear the thundering applause or cheers.
I don’t think.
I don’t do anything but let my heart lead.
And I know without a shadow of doubt, despite how it turned out, that if I had to, I would do it all again.
I walk toward him, as if there’s a lasso wrapped around my waist. I couldn’t stop if I wanted to. I walk off the stage, down the steps, and out into the crowd.
He starts toward me and my heart whimpers when an indescribably acute pang of longing swells in my gut and fills my body when I’m finally close enough to touch him.
The last two years has stripped away any cushion he had last time I saw him. He’s chiseled, refined, honed. From his lush, perfectly cut dark hair, the carefully edged, close-cropped beard and the small scar bisecting his brow, on the spectacular end of virile.
We stare at each other for what feels like an eternity, and the rest of the room falls away as I let my thirsty eyes drink their fill. Over the last few months, I’ve heard him described as every woman’s wet dream. It’s true. He’s dangerously handsome, with a body that’s nearly as famous as the voice that launched him to stardom.
But, right now, all I see is the man whose love changed my life. Whose love I had wanted to live on for as long as I drew breath.
“Beth?” His expression is hesitant, like he doesn’t know what to do next.
But I do. Without waiting for an invitation, I launch myself at him.
His arm wraps around my waist and his hand cups the back of my head.
I bury my face in his neck and inhale the mint, clean male scent of him. I’m home.
Finally.
48
Carter
My Everything
I watched her with my entire heart in my throat. I have never been so proud of anyone, ever, in my whole life.
The whole room just witnessed the sweeping tower of her beauty and courage. Then, they saw the way her expression changed from pride to exultant relief….like a dead man stumbling on a cure, when her eyes landed on me.
Not everyone gets the kind of love I saw in her eyes. I feel like the luckiest man alive right now because she’s back in my arms.
We’re the magnetic halves of one whole - drawn together, locking into place, and then holding on for dear life through the seismic shift of our world righting itself.
