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“Why are you looking at me like that?”
She crosses her arms. “Because, I saw you talking to him, Beth,” she hisses.
Heat floods my face, and my stomach feels like it’s made of lead. What do I say? How I do I even begin to explain Carter? Besides this thing with Duke, the identity of my summer fling is the only secret I’ve ever kept from her
The loud whine of feedback makes us both jump and look toward the small stage at the front of the bar.
The MC is holding the mic with one hand and squinting at a clipboard in his other. “Ya’ll are the luckiest people in the whole state of Texas tonight. Cause, we’ve got a star in our midst. And he’s agreed to sing for us. We should have charged double for entry.”
The crowd cheers and jeers. Panic nearly overwhelms me. The very last thing I need is to be in a room full of people when Carter is singing.
“Can we go?” I grab Dina’s arm and tug.
She pulls out my grasp and signals for our waitress.
“No way. You got to have your little one-on-one thing, the least you can do is let me watch him sing.” She turns and places an order. Resigned, I order one of whatever she’s having. I’m going to need a drink to make it through tonight.
Her eyes are glued to the stage, and even though I know she’s married, the way she’s looking at him scares me. And suddenly I feel the need for her to know he’s the boy from that summer. That’s it’s the love of my life she’s salivating over.
“I need to tell you something.”
She turns, presses a finger to her lips, and shakes her head before she looks back at the stage.
I give up and sit back in my seat, brooding over my predicament. This is what it would have been like to be his girlfriend. The scrutiny would have been bad enough. But this…jealousy might have eaten me alive.
The first chords of the piano filling the room are ones I recognize right away. It’s one of the songs he used to sing to me the summer we met. The “First Time Ever I Saw Your Face” by Roberta Flack. Fuck him. How dare he sing this song, tell my secrets out loud, and make me listen. I have to squeeze my eyes shut to keep myself from looking in his direction.
The piano continues to play for a nearly minute, the same melody over and over, and just when I think I’ll die from sitting here, he starts to sing.
The clear, rich tenor sends a rash of gooseflesh over my entire body. It’s still the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.
My eyes open on their own accord, and I turn to finally look at him.
He’s riveting. The light bounces off his bowed head, shooting prisms of light through his dark hair. When our gazes meet, he doesn’t look away. And neither do I.
He smiles at me, and I find myself smiling back.
Like I’m not melting on the inside.
Like we didn’t just have that wretched conversation.
Like we’re still what we used to be.
God help me, but my memories sold this feeling short.
It’s like flying. I want to go to him and put my arms around him.
To soothe his hurt and let him soothe mine.
To ask him why he left me all alone after he promised he wouldn’t.
And why he’s here now when it’s too late for us?
In the snare of his gaze time vanishes, taking all distance and animus with it.
We’re at the lake house sitting on my bed, talking to each other. His head on my stomach, my hands sift through his hair. His heart thumps against my thighs.
I can feel his warm breath on my skin. The warm weight of his body anchors me in a way nothing has before.
