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I can hardly obey her; each small movement is a struggle without my hands free to assist me. Lying against my tied arms is painful, but she’s in no hurry to alleviate my discomfort.
Spreading my legs wide, she binds them with leather straps to the sides of the bed. Then with a horsetail whip, she flails at my exposed pussy. Some strokes caress, some cut like arrows. I moan exuberantly, but I don’t scream, I couldn’t stand to be gagged too.
I’m sinking deeper into the abyss of fantasy; the pain runs through me in rivers that go deeper and deeper, taking away all conscious thought.
She begins with my cunt, and I begin to hallucinate; at least that’s how it seems. It’s not Tasia’s, but Elizabeth’s face that appears before mine. The thick red lips that would plant rosebud kisses all over my breasts and thighs descend on me the way they did years ago.
The hand moving at my cunt is Elizabeth’s hand. A fiery heat scorches the opening, as I realize she’s penetrating me with her whole hand, the way I tried to do with An
alise.
She’s succeeding where I’ve failed.
I open wider than Tasia’s daughter ever could. My cunt begs to take the fist inside, to have it claim that emptiness, make it full where there’s a vacancy on the inside. I open to take it all; yet even with the grease, the glove, and widening my desiring cunt, I feel her burst inside with a pain so searing that this time I can’t keep from screaming aloud.
It’s Elizabeth’s face glowering at mine, without an inkling of kindness, she burns me more, with candle wax dripping everywhere on my thrust out torso. She’s clamping my nipples, even as her hand slips deeper into my tight channel. Though I’m not sure now what’s happening in reality, and what’s the product of hallucination.
I feel myself sinking deeper into the subterranean abyss of consciousness and sex, where the very lowest of me resides.
The pain is excruciating, but I get used to it, one level accepted to, another level of pain to overcome. I think I’m screaming, but I’m not sure. I know the baton comes down on my belly, but the pain mingles so easily with all the other violations, that I cannot distinguish one from another.
Elizabeth’s face appears and disappears, round eyes, black round eyes, and red lips and leather, and those red lips descending to me…
Hot wax dripping, my clit stings.
“More, yes!” I scream somewhere, on the in or outside; does it matter where?
I’m sinking deeper into the past, to the place where Elizabeth coerced me… sinking faster past old heavens and old hells… to where?
“Take me deeper,” my insides speak. “Can she hear me?”
I feel my vagina emptied, though not lonely for long, something hard replaces the soft searing hand. My feet are tied above me, somewhere far away.
Sinking deeper, “… take me all the way inside,” I cry.
I’m nothing but a speck of dust.
“Elizabeth, come to me, my darling, find me here,” the dark side in me speaks.
I explode everywhere. Something splits me in the middle. A hand finds my ass, the widened sphincter widens more.
Eased in slowly, it jerks me back and forth.
“Elizabeth, come to me.”
I open my eyes on her face, smiling with red lips from heaven in the midst of hell. I explode in the pain, hitting pools of joy I thought were not real.
I’m stopped in the middle of my life, for an instant no longer existing anywhere, as if I were dead. But not dead, my heart still beats, my cunt still pulses, and I’m drifting in “nowhereland”, surrendered.
Soothe me, gentle me back down the path, I hear myself speak to her.
Merry-go-rounds and children playing… I’m starting over, feeling born a second time. I traverse in flashing seconds, a lifetime from fairy rings to pagan drums, light to dark and back again. I don’t know where I’m landing.
Chapter Seventeen
I wake on the pallet with an empty cunt and ass. No bonds or straps or anything else to hold me down and keep me here.
Tasia sleeps near me, behind the curtains surrounding a four poster bed. I half crawl, half stumble to her, finding her flanks ready for me. Glistening juicy, she must be dreaming sex. I accommodate her need with my tongue. I think she cums as she sleeps, her eyes do not open, and there’s hardly a murmur that escapes her lips, yet her body writhes snake-like against the sheets and my face, her thighs pulsing as the shudder runs through her.
