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53
As soon as Derek left, the fun really started.
“OH MY GOD what were you up to?!” Shanna squealed.
“Nothing,” I insisted. My blushing, which had started to die down, returned with a vengeance.
“OH MY GOD you were totally gonna bone him, weren’t you?!”
“NO!” I shouted, sick to my stomach.
But what I did was bad enough.
“Dude is packing some serious heat,” Shanna said, and turned her head back to the hallway as though she could see around the corner and down the hallway if she tried hard enough.
“Shanna – ”
“I mean, I’ve seen bigger, but not attached to a bod like that – ”
“Shanna – ”
“I mean, not outside of pornos, anyway – ”
“SHANNA, would you please stop talking about his thing?” I hissed.
“I’m not talking about his thing, I’m talking about his cock,” she said, relishing my discomfort.
“Then just stop talking, okay?”
She belly-flopped on her bed and then grinned at me like we were at a sleepover. “What’d you do with him?” she asked as she doubled her pillow under her chin to prop up her head.
“We studied.”
“Yeah, right,” she snorted. “If that’s studying, then I like to study every chance I get. What’d you do with him?”
“Nothing!”
She frowned and went all Sherlock Holmes on me. “You didn’t do it, obviously – nobody’s clothes were messed up, and you aren’t sweaty – ”
“We didn’t do anything.”
“Yeah, keep sayin’ that, maybe you’ll believe it. Did you let him get to third base?”
“We didn’t – ”
I paused, uncertain.
“…what’s third base?”
“Hands down pants or under your bra,” she said excitedly, kicking her legs in gleeful anticipation.
I gritted my teeth. “We didn’t do any– ”
“Second base? Did he feel you up?”
I involuntarily lowered my head the tiniest bit in shame.
“OH MY GOD!” she squealed. “Oh my God, oh my God – ”
Then she twisted the pillow in her hands and whispered, “Did you feel him up, too? …did you touch it?”
I put my face in my hands. I felt like I was going to die from embarrassment. “Shut up, please, just shut up – ”
“OH MY GOD, YOU TOUCHED HIS COCK?!”
I looked at her like I was going to kill her – and then heard a couple of giggles from the hallway. Two women were out in the hall staring at us, big smiles plastered on their faces.
I dashed off my bed and SLAMMED the door shut.
“That was rude,” Shanna muttered.
I stalked back to my roommate and jabbed my finger in her face. “LISTEN – we are NOT talking about this anymore – ”
“Ohhhhh, I’m gonna keep talking about it till you tell me what you did,” she said in a gleeful, bratty voice. “Every detail.”
I sank down on my bed and closed my eyes in defeat. “We… we kissed.”
“What, like, once?” she asked, confused.
“No… for a couple of minutes.”
“Niiiice. Like, side by side? Or was he on top of you like you were going to fuck?”
I opened my eyes and scowled at her. “Jesus, Shanna!”
“I just wanna know!”
I hesitated. When I answered, I looked away too quickly. “Side by side.”
She looked at me out of the corners of her eyes… then slowly broke into a grin. “No you weren’t… oh my God, he was totally on top of you! Was he grinding into you?”
“Please stop,” I whimpered, my hands clutching my hair as I bent over, nauseated.
“Did you feel his ass?”
I didn’t say anything… but I nodded.
Shanna squealed, then sighed.
“He has a great ass,” she said philosophically. Then her tone grew final and resolute. “You gotta do him.”
I lifted my head and glared at her. “I am not ‘doing’ him.”
“He’s got a face like a movie star, a bod like an underwear model, an incredible ass, and a big dick to boot. And he is totally in love with you. You have to fuck him, Kaitlyn. It’s, like, a law of physics.”
“There is no law of physics about this!”
“Yes there is, it’s called… Shanna’s Law.”
“Really.”
“Yeah, it’s like, the hotter the dude, the greater inverse proportion to… your regret if you don’t do him… something like that.”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
“I’m probably gonna fail physics anyway,” she said with a dismissive wave of her hand. “But seriously, you already mentally popped the cherry; you should just go ahead and sleep with him.”
