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He really was a librarian. Wow.
He reached out a hand, so Veronica had no choice but to take it. His hand was warm and strong and rough at the edges, as if he built the shelves he later stocked with books. “Nice to meet you,” he said, his voice pleasantly rough along the edges, too.
Veronica didn’t want to know any of that about him. She didn’t want to know how he felt or sounded. He was way too tempting. She pulled her hand away as quickly as she could. “You’re the new librarian?” she asked, not able to keep the shock from her voice.
“I am,” he answered as if he was used to people being surprised by this librarian’s hot young maleness.
“Veronica is a bit of a local celebrity,” Lauren offered.
“No, I’m not,” she said as quickly as she could.
Lauren snorted. “In fact, Gabe, you’re standing right by some of her work.” She gestured toward the local newspapers spread out on a table. “She’s Dear Veronica.”
His white teeth flashed in a smile. “I’m afraid I’m not familiar.”
Veronica crossed her arms and shook her head, but Lauren kept talking. “She writes the local advice column. A smart take from a big-city girl, that kind of a thing.”
“Cool,” he said, looking at the papers now instead of Veronica. That was an improvement, at least. She shifted impatiently, jerking her head toward the door of the conference room to try to get Lauren to move along, but Lauren seemed to be on a mission.
“He’s from New York,” Lauren said. “You two probably have a lot in common. Veronica’s a local but she lived in Manhattan for years.”
Oh, God. Not a New York guy. No. No, no, no. She shook her head as if that could ward him off. When Gabe looked up, he was shaking his head, too. “I was born there, but I’ve been away for years. I came here from Cincinnati.”
“Right,” Veronica said. “Sure.” She crossed her arms more tightly and waited until Lauren finally sent Gabe back toward the small office behind the circulation desk to fill out some paperwork. Then she led Veronica to the conference room.
“Good Lord, girl,” Lauren said as soon as the door closed. “What the hell is wrong with you? If I was ten years younger and single... Did you see that boy?”
Veronica waved a frantic hand. “I don’t have time for that right now!”
“Seriously? I think there really are too many hormones in our food these days, because you’re not okay. And here I thought having firefighters right next door was distracting. Now none of us will get any work done.”
Veronica shot a mournful glance toward the door as if she could see through it. “Did he just start today?”
“Yes, Jean-Marie sprung him on me. I knew she’d been interviewing for Sophie’s replacement, but I didn’t know she’d decided to import a little testosterone from Cincinnati. He’s here to drag us into the twenty-first century, I gather. Ebooks. Digital audio. Maybe even a 3D printer. Basically, he’s going to be a giant pain in my ass, but regardless, I’m going to hook you two up if it kills me.”
“What?” Veronica gasped. “No, you are not! I have problems. Big problems!”
Lauren immediately sobered. “What’s wrong?”
Veronica grabbed her arms. “You know what’s wrong!”
Lauren looked so surprised by Veronica’s freak-out that Veronica felt immediately embarrassed. This was who she was on the inside. This wasn’t the Veronica she let other people see. She didn’t want even her friends to know how weak she really was. She managed to lower her voice but she still couldn’t stop the fear from bubbling up. “That stupid show is in eight hours and I can’t do it.”
Lauren rolled her eyes and then carefully extracted her elbows from Veronica’s grip. “Calm down. You’re going to be great. We’re all coming.”
“No. You don’t understand. I...” She stared at Lauren’s face, wanting to tell her the truth. Wishing she could. But this lie was all she had anymore. It felt like all she’d ever had.
She’d spent the first twenty-one years of her life waiting for her real life to start, planning and saving for it. She’d put off making close friends and falling in love and doing crazy things and taking chances, because she’d thought she would do all that once she got to New York. And what if she got so cozy and tied down in Wyoming that she never went? No. Too much of a risk. So she’d waited.
But then she’d finally gotten to the big city, and...none of that had been real, either. And now here she was back home, living the biggest lie of all.
So instead of saying, I’m a complete impostor, and I can’t pull that off in a live show, she went with the almost-true version of it. “It takes me days to write a column and do research and get everything right and still be entertaining. I can’t do all of that in front of people!”
“Then why did you arrange these shows?”
“I didn’t! It wasn’t my idea. My boss told me I was going to do them, and I needed the extra money, so I said yes instead of sobbing and running into the hills!”
Lauren was clearly trying to look patient, but she had to press her lips together to hide a smile. It didn’t work.
