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He cut her off with a snort, spreading his hands wide. "It's too late."
Alex resisted the urge to press her hands to the ache between her legs.
"You are despicable. To trap me into a marriage that I never once encouraged. Jesus, you're English. An English princess. What the hell am I supposed to do with you at a horse farm? God damn it!" A small stool flew across the floor, propelled by his bare foot.
She gasped, struck by hurt and sudden alarm. She had known he wouldn't be happy, but she hadn't thought he'd be quite so mad. What did it matter anyway, if he was the first or the tenth?
"You were a virgin. You could have married anyone. Why do this to me?"
She blinked back tears and the urge to hit him. "Don't be stupid," she yelled instead of slapping. "Why would I want to marry you?" He didn't even look her way, simply kept pacing and panting, enraged because he might have to suffer her presence for the rest of his life.
"I am the daughter of a duke. I am rich, richer than you'll ever be, Collin Blackburn. What the hell makes you think I would deign to marry a Scots bastard who breeds horses for money?" That got his attention, froze him in his tracks. "I wasn't looking for marriage, you idiot. I was looking to get 'plowed' as you so eloquently put it. Really, what's the point of being a whore if you can't enjoy yourself once in a while?"
" 'Enjoy yourself.''"
The rush of her anger drained away at the hatred in his eyes. When he took a step, she backed away.
"Ye wee selfish bitch. You've been handed everything your whole life. Everything and still it wasn't enough. You had to ruin your brother's life and your own. My brother too. And now me.
"I was one of those shiny things you wanted, eh? Another toy to entertain you? Well, you've had me. Was it as good as you expected, spreading your legs for a low-born Scot?"
Her chin shook, giving her away. She clenched her teeth and glared. "No," she answered, very clearly. "No, it wasn't nearly as good as I'd hoped."
She had thought him angry enough, but her reckless, spiteful words goaded him into fury. The skin of his face tightened and paled, and his silver eyes glittered. She took another step back, actually flinched when he raised his arm. She stared at his large hand, waiting for it to strike her, but he only ran it through his hair, gaping in disgust at her fear.
"Do you think me an animal, Alex? Is that why you wanted me? The danger of a man who might strike you when you need it?"
"No, I. . ." Her throat closed up with tears that she refused to let out. "I just wanted to be with you."
"You knew I would not want this. You knew I would never have done this if I'd known."
"I did," she answered with false bravado. "But I never lied to you. You just assumed."
Collin shook his head and the sadness on his face thickened the tears in her throat. "I did assume. You're right. And you will marry me now, whether you will it or no."
"I won't."
&nb
sp; "I'll go to your brother and tell him what's happened."
"No. I'll deny it. . . that I was a virgin. I'll tell him you're after my fortune."
He drew back, taking her in with cold eyes this time, eyes that measured her and found her less than he'd expected. "You'd truly do that?"
"I would."
His face turned from her. He looked out the window, at nothing, at darkness. She watched the anger drain from him, watched his shoulders slump.
"I tried hard not to dishonor you when I thought you a harlot. To be the one to make you into that. . ." The sound of his choking laugh made her ache. "You knew it would hurt me."
"I'm sorry," she whispered, as one tear finally escaped her control. "I'm sorry. I wanted you, you're right. But it's not fair. If I were a man—"
"But you're not a man. You're a woman—a girl, it seems."
"I don't want to marry," she cried out, frustrated and hurt. "You or anyone else. My life is more now than it ever was. I am free to do as I please."
"Don't be childish," he spat. "You are not free. Where are all your friends? Where are your loyal suitors? You are free to dress as a boy and roust about with laborers, but what of a husband? What of children?"
