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Just like that, all her sadness was gone, and Cynthia laughed until tears leaked from her eyes. “You are so very arrogant.”
“I certainly am not! And you are outrageous.”
“I am that. And I am also very well, thank you for asking again.”
He watched from the corner of his eye as she smiled down at the path. “You are not…disgusted?”
“I am not even scandalized.”
Well, that was one thing. Lancaster tried to pretend he felt only mild relief when, in fact, he was reeling as if he’d held his breath for hours.
“I did not mean for you to see what happened this morning.”
“Yes, I know.”
And that was it. There was nothing else awful to say. But he still had a difficult task ahead of him. He led Cynthia to a stone bench and sat with her.
Daffodils had begun to bloom and the scent of green leaves tripped to them on the wind. It was springtime, and he must return to London. “About our future…”
“Nick, I won’t deny that I love you. I do. I always have. But love cannot make a future for a family. It can’t be everything. Your family is depending on you to marry well, and I am nothing short of a disastrous match. I won’t destroy your future. I won’t.”
He’d known what she must say, and yet he still wanted to grab her and kiss her and shake her for good measure. “So you will go to America?”
“I will.”
“All
right,” he answered, and Cynthia seemed startled by that. Good. “Though perhaps you might wait a time. You could be with child, you know. My child.”
He watched as she pressed her free hand to her belly in a moment that made his heart thump, but then she shook her head. “No. I…My belly is already aching.”
Lancaster shook his head in puzzlement.
“It means I will bleed soon.”
“Ah.” These things were a bit of a fascinating mystery to him. “You’re sure of that?”
“Yes. It’s the same every month.”
“I see.”
Her face flushed, and Lancaster cleared his throat.
“Have you written to your aunt?”
“Um. Yes, I have.” She darted a puzzled look at him. Oh, she meant to go, but she’d expected a fight.
“Emma says that she will help you choose a paid companion. I hope you’ll consider her recommendation. She’s canny about people.”
Her forehead creased. “Of course,” she snapped, then lapsed into silence.
They sat quietly for a long while watching the daffodils bob their heads in the breeze. Or Lancaster watched them. Cynthia glared as if they’d betrayed her in some way.
Finally, he cleared his throat. “I will come for you, you know.”
She turned to face him. “Pardon?”
“I won’t marry someone else. Ever.”
