Page 33 of Vacations from Hell


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Excuse me?

“You can’t lead me on like that and then not finish what you started,” he says, his voice low and rumbly.

“I don’t think that’s the way it works,” I tell him.

“I think it is,” he says, pulling me back toward him.

“No, it really isn’t. I’m not ready.”

“You seem ready to me.”

Maybe he’s right. Maybe I am ready. I try to relax. I take a deep breath. This is what I want. He certainly deserves to be my first.

“Hmm,” I say, taking a deep breath. I kiss the edge of his lips. And then his cheek. And then I nibble on his ear. Carefully. And then I move down to the top of his neck. He just smells so delicious. Tasty. The real Parfum de Vie—scent of life. Hungry, I kiss his neck. Lick his neck. Lick off the aftershave. Yum.

“That feels so good,” he murmurs.

I open my mouth wider. Here it comes. I’m ready. I can do this. Be fearless.

I sink my teeth into his neck.

“Hey!” he screams. “That hurts.” He tries to pull back.

Now it’s too late to go back. It’s time. I pull him back toward me, steady his face between my cold hands, and bite him again.

Liz was right. This isn’t that hard.

As he pointlessly struggles to get away, he asks, “Why are you doing this to me?”

Because I’m thirsty, I think but don’t say. I’m too busy drinking.

“What…are you?” he mumbles just before he passes out.

I swallow a mouthful of blood. Much better than a Bloody Mary. “I’m a vampire,” I explain, and then finish him off.

I did it. I did it!

My first time. I have to admit, I’m kind of proud of myself.

Once I’ve drained his body, I heave it over the railing and watch him disappear into the blackness below.

After I hear a soft splash, I let myself out.

I find Hailey and Liz alone on the pool deck.

Hailey is lying across a lounge chair, her eyes wide open, her arms and legs trembling.

“Yay, you did it!” Liz says. “Full?”

“Stuffed,” I say. “Extra delicious. Fantabulous. Even better than Checker Boy, or the old bartender, or hot tub girl.”

“Fresh is always better than leftovers.”

“You are absolutely right.”

“Although you didn’t taste Ali or Carly,” Liz says. “They were pretty tasty.”

I look down at Hailey, who’s staring into the sky, still trembling. “I thought she’d be overboard by now. You decided to change her instead?”

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