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I lay my head down in the soft grass and go to sleep. At one point, I open my eyes, and I’m back in my bed at St. Jude’s, the TV showing the coyote chasing the roadrunner, the numbing hum of the respirator and feet padding down corridors filling my ears. I drift back into sleep. But in my dream, I see Gonzo and Balder back in the diner, trying to fight off the fire giants and the Wizard of Reckoning by themselves, and I think, I’m the one who got them into this mess. I can’t sleep; I have to go back.
I wake with a start. The old lady’s still tending her garden. “Feeling better, dear?”
“Yeah,” I say.
“Did you make up your mind about those waffles?” she asks, examining another long vine, her scissors paused above it.
“I can’t,” I say. “I have to get back to my friends.”
The old lady lets the vine spring back and moves on to another. “Very well. Another time. Oh, my dear, I left my watering can over there. Could you bring it to me?”
“Where?”
She waves in the direction of the green fields. “Out there. You’ll find it.”
Tromping through the tall grass, I’m stopped in my tracks by the sight of a roadrunner. It’s standing there calmly, just watching me.
“Hey,” I say, inching closer. “Hey there, little fella.”
The minute I get close enough to touch it, the roadrunner takes off. It stops about a hundred yards away and looks back at me, like it’s waiting for me to come after it.
“I’ll be right back with that can!” I yell.
The old lady keeps singing her song, something about sand castles and ninjas. I chase after the roadrunner, going faster and faster, reaching my hand out to touch its feathers. My fingers close around air, and I hit the ground hard, coughing and hacking as the dirt fills my mouth like smoke.
“Cameron! Cameron!” Gonzo’s holding a wet napkin to his mouth with one hand and trying to pull me out from under the table with the other. “Come on, cabrón—move your bony ass!”
I give one good cough. My legs finally get the command and I push out of there with enough force to take Gonzo with me.
“Where’s Balder?” I scream.
“I don’t know!”
“I am here!” The world’s most badass Viking yard gnome is on the counter by the cash register using a dinner plate as a shield and a steak knife as a sword. “No doubt Loki has sent this treacherous wizard and his dragons to test me,” he shouts. “Fear not! I will slay them all and use their bones to adorn my table at Breidablik before I would allow them to harm you, noble Cameron!”
“I’m here, too, you know!” Gonzo shouts.
“Live to fight another day, my friend,” I say, grabbing him and pushing through the door into the smoky parking lot. People race away from the burning restaurant, searching for a safe spot in the madness. The sky’s unnaturally dark. Lightning boxes the clouds with quick uppercuts of electricity. Howling, the fire giants stretch over the top of the restaurant and beat their chests in triumph.
Just then, an enormous boom rattles the entire parking lot, and everything—the Konstant Kettle, the Mister Motel, the cars and trucks—is sucked into the swirling black hole above. The sky closes. There’s nothing left but flames and smoke and bystanders, and curiously, the restaurant’s collection of snow globes.
Across the freeway, the freaked-out patrons of the Konstant Kettle wave down cars, yelling for help. We run as fast and as far as we can, until we’re about a mile down the road. In the distance, a fleet of fire trucks screams toward the big orange fireball that used to be a restaurant. The Kettle is Konstant no more.
Gonzo comes toward me, wild-eyed. He makes a time-out T with his hands. “Okay. Pause game: what the hell just happened?” He’s panting.
“From the depths of Hel,” Balder whispers.
“That guy was the same one we saw in New Orleans,” Gonzo continues. “What’s he doing here with those creepy fire acrobats? And don’t tell me this is about some old dead jazzman’s gambling debts, ’cause I ain’t buying that mierda anymore.”
“I—I think they’re following us.” I’d cry, but I’m too scared.
Gonzo puts his inhaler so far into his mouth I think he’s going to eat it. “Holy Shithenge,” he says when he can talk again. “Why? What did you do to piss them off? Whatever it was, tell them you’re sorry!”
Balder strokes his beard. “This is some treachery brought about by Loki, I’ve no doubt. The trickster god is ever in play and will do his part to bring about the twilight of the gods.”
“You are freaking me out, gnome man!” Gonzo screeches.
“Chill, both of you.” Another siren wails past us on its way to the fire. I take a deep breath, try to calm myself. “He’s called the Wizard of Reckoning, and those guys with him are the fire giants. They’re not from this world. They got here through the wormhole Dr. X opened up. They are the dark energy that’s going to destroy the world. I think they’re following us to Dr. X’s secret location, because he’s the only one who can close the portal. They take him out first, it’s game over for everybody.”
