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So, that’s it.
In the end, Savage decided not to propose. Not even for pretend. Not even to recoup a million bucks out of the four million he forfeited because of me. Not even when he was offered a free freaking ring from some fancy jeweler. I have no doubt Savage loves me with all his heart. For crying out loud, the man secretly paid two million bucks to keep me on the show, netting him literally nothing in salary for three months of hard work. But the fact remains, no matter how much Savage loves me, proposing to me—even if only for pretend—was a bridge too far for him.
I shouldn’t feel disappointed about that. But if I’m being honest, I do. I desperately wanted Savage to earn that bonus. But even more so, I want Savage to want to marry me! Yes! My feelings are so clear now. More than any amount of money or fame or success in my career, I want to marry Adrian—and I want him to feel the same way.
When the lights turn off, a PA immediately escorts Savage and me offstage, before I’ve had a chance to say a word to him. She compliments our performance and instructs us to wait with her in the wings while Sunshine announces this season’s winner. “Once Sunshine makes the announcement,” the PA explains, “the winning judge will run onstage to congratulate their contestant for a moment, before the remainder of the cast joins the winning judge and contestant onstage for the ‘big celebration.’”
“It’s gonna be Addison,” Savage whispers to me, referring to the blue-haired cutie who’s amassed an unprecedented army of fans since the first audition episode aired.
I take a deep breath. That’s what he wants to talk about, after what he just decided not to do out there—who’s going to be crowned this season’s winner on the show? “It’d better be,” I whisper, even though there are a thousand other things I want to say, if we were alone. Or maybe, if only I had the courage.
“And the winner this season is . . .” Sunshine, says onstage, as the two finalists—mine and Savage’s—huddle together next to the host, both contestants looking like they’re going to barf. Sunshine looks up from the opened envelope in her hands and shrieks, “Addison Swain!”
As streamers and glitter burst from the ceiling above the stage, I feel swept away in my excitement for Addison and forget about my own concerns for a moment. I hug Savage standing next to me, crying tears of joy for my blue-haired favorite, and a moment later, the PA nudges me and says, “Go congratulate Addison now, Laila! Go, go, go!”
As the house band begins playing an upbeat, celebratory dance song, I stride gleefully onto the stage to my darling pixie and take her into my arms. For a long moment, we cry together. I don’t know about Addison, but this feels like the finish line of a legit marathon to me.
Out of nowhere, Sunshine shoves a microphone in Addison’s face, and she breaks from our hug to thank me profusely for making her win possible. She goes on to thank the audience at home for voting for her, week after week. And her family for their support, too. She thanks the writer of every song she’s ever performed, and Sunshine and the producers of the show, and I laugh and cry with her, through it all.
When it’s my turn to take Sunshine’s microphone, I tell Addison she was already a star the minute she walked onstage that very first time and blew me away. “Your victory today has nothing to do with me, honey,” I say, and I mean it with all my heart.
Once I’ve made my little speech, the whole cast descends onto the stage—the other three judges and all four mentors—and we commence a not-so spontaneous dance party in celebration of Addison’s win, as well as yet another successful season of the show. The most successful season yet, as a matter of fact, in terms of ratings and popularity. In fact, from what Daria has told me, Nadine has already indicated her fervent desire to have Savage and me return next season. And not only that, to sign both of us to a multi-year deal.
As music and dancing and laughter continue swirling around me onstage, I glance at Savage across the crowd to find him laughing with genuine abandon with Kendrick, Fish, and Colin, and my heart skips a beat at his easygoing demeanor. It’s especially gratifying to catch him, once again, looking comfortable and friendly with Colin. After my birthday party, I asked Savage if he’d said something to Colin to bury the hatchet, and Savage confirmed he had, and that Colin had been extremely receptive and appreciative.
While I’m still looking at my boyfriend, his gaze finds mine. For a moment, time stops as we smile at each other from across the crowded stage, both of us basking in not only our love, but also our newfound freedom from the pressure-cooker of the show. The constant social media posts we’ve been required to make. The fishbowl nature of it all. On the one hand, it’s been the happiest three months of my life, living and working with Savage. And I know Savage feels the exact same way. But I’m also more than relieved to move onto the next phase of our relationship, a much more private one that’s not for show, but only for us. I can’t wait to find out who we are when we’re living together in my tiny condo, rather than a sprawling reality TV mansion. I can’t wait to find out who Savage and Laila are when nobody is watching.
