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He dipped his chin. “I had an unfortunate thought. I’m sorry.”
She pressed her palms against his pecks and smoothed her way to his shoulders. “Renee?”
“Yes.” His gaze flew to her face. “How did you know?”
She appeared to debate her response, then said, “We both lost so much. I haven’t been with a man since I got here.”
His eyes widened. “Not once?”
“No. Oh, God I just realized that would add pressure, but I didn’t mean it to. I never wanted to be with anyone until you. We can stop if you like. Honestly, Grant, I’ve had the brakes on since we met. I’ve barely got them off now and I can’t offer a single guarantee that I won’t slam them back on and leave you out in the cold at some point either.”
He gathered her against him and held her close. His eyes burned. He reached to the central lever and shut of the water from overhead. The other two still sent warm sprays of water over them both from opposite directions.
“I want to make love to you, but damn this feels intimate and wonderful and more permanent than I’ve ever allowed before.”
She squeezed him hard. “We’re in the same boat. How about we give each other permission to walk away at any time.”
“Sounds good. Maybe necessary. I’ve also dealt with the shit of this world by not getting close to anyone.”
He felt her take a deep breath then release a sigh. “Ditto. Okay. So, we’re letting each other off the hook here.” She drew back and met his gaze.
He nodded slowly. He didn’t know how true or accurate that was. But for the moment, it helped. Maybe that’s what this would be between them, helping each other over the hurdles one at a time.
He shut off the remaining heads then grabbed a nearby towel. He took his time drying her off then handed her a fresh one. “For your hair.”
As she tended to her dripping locks, he began his own drying off process, including squeezing water from his hair.
When he started to leave the shower, she caught his arm. “Truly, you don’t have to do this.”
She was exactly what he needed right now. “I want to more than you can know.”
He took her towel and tossed it on the floor then picked her up and cradled her in his arms. “Let me take you to bed.”
~ ~ ~
As Grant carried her into the bedroom, Natalie felt buoyant. She was right where she wanted to be, loose strings attached.
She shifted in his arms and leaned up to plant her mouth on his throat. She slung her free arm around his neck to pull him closer then began to suck. His wonderful scent of fresh-cut lumber began to flood her nostrils. She ached between her legs and couldn’t wait for more.
She’d enjoyed sex with Aaron. It had been sensual, hot and full of love. A niggling of doubt passed through her that she shouldn’t be engaging with Grant like this. He’d already gotten distressed.
But Aaron wasn’t here.
He’d been gone six years.
As Grant settled her on the bed, then gently pulled her hips to edge, she reached up and touched his face. Grant was here, and he was real, so real. His skin was warm and smooth, except where a line of his wolf-fur exaggerated his prominent cheekbones. His damp hair, pulled as it was away from his face, enhanced his strong, rugged looks.
Yes, Grant was here.
He seemed serious as he dropped to his knees. He spread her legs and leaned all the way over her first to kiss her on the lips then to plant a series of kisses down her chest. He took time with each breast until all her doubts melted into the comforter beneath her.
She wanted this with Grant. She’d wanted to be with him, to make love with him, to have real, here-and-now sex with him from the time they’d been together in the refuge’s emergency room.
Her body responded to each tug on her breast, each fondle of his fingers, each strong suck. Her hips rocked, and deep moans left her mouth.
He kept massaging her breasts, but his lips began a slow, sensual descent. Her sex clenched as he drew near her labia. She held her breath and waited.
Instead of continuing to the desired goal, he lifted her right knee and kissed the inside of her thigh. Of course, this was a whole new layer of sensation, a teasing kind of kiss that made her hips rock harder still. He took his time. She wasn’t sure if she loved it or hated it. She wanted his mouth on her.
