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Chin still near my chest, I looked up at him. “What do you mean, new man? What’s so different?” I playfully prodded him in the arm.
“Well, it wasn’t just the weight. I was kind of a wuss. Life was passing me by, you know? Took up boxing, gave up all the moping and self-pity, and here we are. Talking to a gorgeous girl. You wouldn’t have got five words out of me a year ago.”
His candor was surprisingly refreshing. I could never do that.
I guess talking about losing a few pounds, taking up a new sport and getting confident is a little different than having a baby with your mom’s husband. Would he still think all these great things about me if he knew the truth?
“Sure,” I said, “Nate it is. Well hey; I have to get to class. Starts in a few minutes. See you around?”
“Oh, definitely. Say, what class is it? Can’t be Physics II with... uh... I can’t read his name. Something German looking. Sh-sh-sh-shwansh? I donno.”
I had to laugh. “Oh, yeah looks like it is. Don’t worry, I can’t pronounce it either. Hopefully he’ll tell us how.”
***
Class was unremarkable, but both Nate and I noticed that the professor avoided pronouncing his own name; something we had quite a laugh about afterwards. And then, the thing I had not even realized I was absolutely terrified of happening, happened.
“Hey, Liz, you want to hang out sometime? Just for, I donno, coffee or a drink?”
He had a charming smile, just like Peter’s. He must also have been intuitive. He noticed my balking.
“Oh, no worries. I’ll bet you’re really busy. But hey – invitation is open. If you ever change your mind, just let me know. Hell, we can even just meet up before class if that’s more your speed. No pressure.” He said, adorable grin still in place.
“Th-thanks, Nate. Really, I appreciate it.” I replied.
I really did like him. And that felt a little wrong. It seemed like he meant he wanted to hang out as friends, but I wasn’t so sure that’s all I wanted. Even if it was only a friendly cup of coffee, how could I explain my living situation without scaring him off?
Just too much, too soon, I thought, especially on my first day of the new, normal life. Maybe I just wasn’t ready for a friend.
“Wait a minute,” I said in spite of myself as he was gathering his things, “I really do want to hang out sometime. I’d like to catch up. It’s just... well, a lot has happened this past year. A lot. It’s hard for me to even understand it myself, much less explain it to anyone. Give me some time, okay? I promise I’ll take you up on it soon.”
He nodded, with that same easy smile on his face.
“I was serious too,” he said, “no worries. Anytime you like, we’ll have a blast! Don’t feel like you have to explain anything to me. The new Nate, he doesn’t judge anybody.”
I nodded and realized that for some reason, Nate’s gentleness and caring had almost made me break down in tears. I knew I needed to be careful not to unload on this poor guy and terrify him. But, he seemed to be so genuine that I wasn’t terribly worried.
“I gotta run,” he said, “gotta get in some time at the heavy bag before work. See you for class Thursday?”
“Yeah, that sounds good. Have fun punching the shit out of a bag.”
That got a good, hearty laugh.
He surprised me with a hug goodbye.
I hugged back.
His arms were strong, and they felt good around me. That was the first time that I had felt connected to someone outside of my curious little family in ages.
“Liz,” I said to myself on the way back to the bus stop, “maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to open up to someone. If it does happen, it should be Nate. Maybe I need this.”
“Yeah, I know,” I replied, feeling slightly embarrassed that I was conversing with myself in broad daylight. “I just gotta give myself some time. Time to adjust.”
Chapter Four
“Hey! There she is!” Peter’s comfortable baritone greeted me when I walked in the house, took off my shoes and slumped into my favorite chair.
“Man, missing bus stops can be a real drag,” I said. “For future reference, Route J is not the same as Route I, even though the letters look alike. Ugh.”
