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Oh, Lord, why did Shane disturb her so much in ways that Josh, his twin, never had, or could? Why had she allowed it? Why couldn't she at this very moment decide not to get caught up in further feelings for Shane, somehow knowing that she would be better off for it?
"I know why I can't," she whispered, a rush of pleasure soaring through her at the thought of Shane's wild, passionate kisses. "He makes me feel more like a woman than any other man has been able to. He's awakened me to feelings that I never knew existedfeelings that I thought people never truly experienced, but only read about in books. I never want to lose these feelings. Never!"
In truth, she never wanted to lose Shane. She had to make sure that she didn't!
At the top of the hill, Melanie sank her heels into the horse's flanks and rode onward through the forest, peering ahead for any sign of Shane or his campfire. An uneasiness began to creep over her, for not only did she not see any campfire, she didn't smell any smoke. Had he left? Had she been wrong to think he had felt something special for herand proved it by the way he kissed her? Or had she been nothing but a passing fancy for him? Was he more like Josh than she had guessed?
Now upon the campsite, Melanie eased out of her saddle, numb. A keen disappointment assailing her, she looked down at the campfire that had sunk into a pile of damp coals. And though a blanket and Shane's fringed buckskin shirt still lay beside the firepit, he wasn't there.
Then Melanie's eyes were drawn to something that seemed peculiar in this setting. She tied her horse's reins to a tree, then went and knelt down on the blanket and picked up a deck of cards. She turned it over and over in her hands, studying it. They were the kind of playing cards most generally used for playing poker. She ought to know. Both Josh and Terrance were gamblers.
These cards had to be Shane's.
But he did not seem the sort to indulge in . . .
A crushing of leaves behind Melanie made her drop the cards and rise quickly to her feet. Turning, her breath was stolen away when she saw Shane walking toward her. She was engulfed with a shameless passion when she gaped openly at him. He was shirtless. His long, golden hair was dripping wet over his shoulders, and his muscled chest was sleek with water. Surely no man could be as handsome, as seductive as Shane was at this moment.
"Shane!" Melanie said, her shameful thoughts causing color to rush to her cheeks. "For a
moment I thought you had left. You have no fire"
He interrupted her. "I allowed the fire to
burn itself out last night because I feared that someone else would see it," he said stiffly. "It had already attracted too much attention."
Melanie was stung by his coldness and stiff reserve. It was not the way she had expected to be greeted by him. She wanted to ask why, yet was afraid to hear the answer. He had surely spent the long night thinking through his decision of what he should do in the light of everything he now knew about his family, and had decided it was best to move on. That meant he would place her from his mind and life as well!
A chill ran through Melanie as the damp breeze penetrated her thin cotton dress. She looked at Shane and the wetness of his hair and body, drawing her shawl more comfortably around her shoulders. "Shane, you're wet," she murmured. "Aren't you cold?"
"During my teachings as a child with the Chippewa, I was taught to practice endurance," he said, still standing stiffly, looking at Melanie with something close to contempt. "More than once my adviser put dry sunflower seeds on my wrists. These were lit at the top and I had to let them burn clear down to my skin. They hurt and made sores but if I had knocked them off or cried, I would have been called a woman."
He held his shoulders proudly squared. "In comparison, the cold air and water are no more than the sting of a tiny fly on my skin."
Melanie winced at the thought of what he must have had to endure in his lifetime. He even acted as though she were now something else he had to endure.
But why?
Last night he had behaved so differently toward her. What had caused him to change?
She couldn't stand not knowing any longer. She went to Shane and placed a gentle hand on his arm and looked up at him with pleading eyes. "What's wrong, Shane?" she blurted. "Why are you acting so distant, so cold, toward me? If I have done something wrong, I need to know."
Shane looked down at Melanie, trying to stifle the yearnings for her that were gnawing away at his heart. He had tasted her lips. He had smelled her sweetness. Even now, she smelled like roses that grew wild in the forest.
His gaze raked over her. Unlike yesterday, she wore feminine clothing, and her shawl did not cover her entirely. He could see her ripe, curving breasts where her dress dipped low in front, causing a slow burning ache in his loins.
His gaze moved slowly upward. The early morning light bathed her face in a soft reflective glow, limning her throat and slender neck. Her long and lustrous auburn hair was fluttering gently in the breeze; her lips were slightly parted as their eyes locked and momentarily held.
He wanted to draw her into his arms and kiss her, and tell her how he felt about her. He had waited a lifetime for a woman to speak to his heart in the way that she did. But now?
He had to refuse himself this woman who had left his arms only to go to his brother's. What had she told his brother about Shane? That she had made a fool of him? Had they laughed about it together? Was he something to laugh at, since he had not had a white man's education or upbringing?
Shane placed his fingers to Melanie's shoulders and pushed her aside, then went and pulled his shirt over his head. Bending to one knee, he picked up his deck of cards and blanket and began moving away from Melanie. He had carefully hidden his white stallion within a thick stand of trees. He could not get to it quickly enough, for another moment with her and he would have not been able to resist her.
It was best that he leave. He now knew that he should have gone sooner. Seeing Melanie again was pure torture.
But he could not shake the memory of her in Josh's arms. If she loved Josh, why had she kissed Shane so intimately? Why?
Melanie was numb as she watched Shane walk away. She had seen too much in his eyes not to know that he had special feelings for her. When he was gazing raptly down at her, it was as though they were melting together, two people becoming one in both heart and soul.
