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He framed her face between his hands. “Remembering this, can you still want to see and hold your youngest son in your arms again?” he asked, searching her eyes. “Ina, he should be as dead in your heart as he is in mine.”
“I am so proud of everything that my husband did, and of what you are doing for our people,” Pure Heart said softly. “So is your father proud as he gazes down at you from the stars in the sky where he now makes his home.”
She lowered her eyes, then again looked into Brave Wolf’s. “Although I am not as proud of Night Horse as I am of you, nothing can take away the fact that I gave birth to him and that I shall love him, no matter what he has done, until the last breath leaves his lungs . . . or mine,” she murmured. “Knowing this, will you not do as I ask? Will you not at least go and search for him one more time? If you do, and you cannot find him, then I shall never ask such a thing of you again. I shall know that you at least made an attempt to bring him home to me so that I can make some sort of peace with him.”
“You know that the search could carry me across a vast area, and even then I might not find him,” Brave Wolf said. “The search will take me from our people for many sunrises and sunsets. Knowing that, and also knowing that it is my place to stay with our people, to keep ugliness from our village, you still wish for me to go? If I choose others to go on the search, would that satisfy you?”
“I trust our warriors when a request is made of them that does not go against everything they believe in, but now? When I ask something they will frown upon . . . to search for someone who has betrayed the Crow . . . I cannot wholly trust that they would bring him home alive to me.”
Brave Wolf was disturbed to hear that his mother did not fully trust those who were under Brave Wolf’s command, but he could not dispute her words.
He was beginning to see that he had no choice but to do this for his mother. He saw how distraught she was, and had been since she had become aware of Night Horse’s disappearance. He feared her anxiety might hurry along her death. He would do anything to keep her with him longer on this earth.
If he had to come face to face with Night Horse again, so be it.
“Yes, Mother, I hear you well and I feel your pain when you speak of your youngest son, so I will do as you ask of me,” Brave Wolf said tightly. “If I find Night Horse, I will bring him home to you. If I do not find my brother, you must realize that it is time to put aside your grie
ving and work at becoming stronger.”
Pure Heart smiled through her tears. She placed a gentle hand on Brave Wolf’s cheek. “You just called Night Horse your brother,” she murmured. “That must mean that inside your heart, you do still see him as such.”
“Although I do not wish to claim him as blood kin, he is my brother, for did we not come from the same womb and seed?” Brave Wolf said, then drew her gently into his arms. “Mother, I love you so much. Please rest while I am gone. I shall search until I feel it is time to return home. You must accept Night Horse’s fate then. Will you?”
“Yes, I will openly accept it, but inside my heart, if Night Horse is not with you, I will be crying,” Pure Heart murmured. “Go now, son. Prepare those warriors who will ride with you, and those who will remain home to provide protection to those who need it in your absence. I will pray for your return, as well as for your brother’s and those who ride with you.”
He hugged her tenderly, kissed her softly on the cheek, then left her lodge.
Reluctantly he brought his warriors into the council house and told them his plan, that they would search for Night Horse, and if they found him, would bring him home.
Hardly any of his warriors wanted to accompany Brave Wolf on this particular mission, even if it was their chief asking them, and even if it was his mother who needed this son at her side during her illness.
As they saw it, Night Horse was no longer one of them. He was a disgrace, someone who deserved not even one more thought.
Brave Wolf had said that he understood their feelings, for they matched his own, but it was a mother’s plea that had reached inside his heart.
After he had asked them to think of her, his warriors finally agreed to go with him.
Not long before, Brave Wolf had captured a prized dark sorrel from those he had seen picketed close to an enemy camp. He rode that horse now through Crow country, his warriors dutifully accompanying him.
They carried a varied assortment of weapons, some even carrying rifles. Some time ago, his people had believed that those whose skin was white were people of magic. When they had arrived in this land, they had carried “firesticks” that barked like thunder. At first, the Crow had truly thought the “firesticks” made lightning, capable of killing them from afar.
But the Crow no longer feared this fiery weapon. Sun Father watched over them and Mother Earth guided them as the warriors rode proudly across lush meadows and wooded hills that abounded with game.
The Crow saw their country as a gift to them from the First Maker, who created the world. Their land had snowy mountains and sunny plains, different climates and good things for every season.
When the summer heat scorched the prairies, the Crow could draw up under the mountains where the air was sweet and cool, the grass fresh, and where the bright streams tumbled out of the snow banks.
There with his powerful bow made of mountain-sheep horn and covered with the skin of a rattlesnake, Brave Wolf had proudly hunted the elk, the deer, and the antelope.
There one could always see plenty of white bears and mountain sheep.
There, a warrior could find many places to hide. But Brave Wolf knew of one special place. It was where he was leading his men.
He was almost certain that his brother would be hiding there.
Chapter Three
Dull sublunary lovers’ love
