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“You’re never going to let this go, are you?” he groans, scrubbing his hands over his face and sitting up.

“Never.”

“Fine.”

Seven

Fuck.

This was a conversation I did not want to have. Not with her. Not with anyone. But after the past couple of days, I know I owe it to her. She lost her best friend. Then, she gave herself to me somewhere along the way as she sought the truth. If I want to keep the girl, I have to tell her.

And fuck do I want to keep her.

I have a waiting list a mile long at the club, and I’d tell them to scrap it if it meant I got to fuck sweet Natasha every night.

“Ren,” she urges, her nostrils flaring.

Running my palm over the back of my neck, I let out a sigh. “It was an accident.” I throw on some boxers and sit on the edge of my bed.

“So you’ve said.” Her eyes water and her bottom lip wobbles. I can take her anger, but this fucking sucks.

“Come here,” I rumble, reaching for her.

“N-No,” she whispers, taking a step away from me. “Just tell me. Please.”

“William is my friend from high school,” I tell her. “His family…” I inhale the scent of cinnamon and the loss of my mother still makes my chest ache all these years later. “His family paid for my mother’s hospital bills when she was diagnosed with cancer. I was a junior in high school. Just seventeen when she passed.”

Nat’s brows furrow together and I can tell she wants to comfort me, but barely refrains.

“My brother Ronan was twenty and in college. There was no way we could pay the bills. The Warners stepped up, thanks to William, and paid off the debts. Once my brother took off with Harose Records, he paid them back. Every penny. The moment he could. But we never forgot what they did for us.”

“I’m sorry about your mom,” she murmurs. “But you’re beating around the bush. Tell me what happened with Kate.”

“I’m getting to that. Anyway, despite our growing apart as far as our careers go, William and I have remained friends. The more he pads his political résumé, the more I don’t exactly fit in his world. The past couple of years, he’s treated me like a dirty little secret. Normally, I find it funny as fuck and love to taunt him when his proclivities leak over into his pristine politician world.” I scrub at my face with my hand that still smells of pussy. “He’s into my scene but hides that part of himself. Even from his fiancée. Well, ex-fiancée now.”

“William and Kate were seeing each other?” she asks, scrunching her nose. “The note.” She leaves the room for a minute and then rushes back in, thrusting the note at me.

He doesn’t love her. She’s an accessory to him. I’m real. I know he won’t marry her. Not when he has me on the side. I know what he likes because I like it too. It has to be enough.

“They were both novices in the whole breathplay kink. And…” I trail off and frown at her. “They fucked up, Nat. Took it too far.”

My eyes fall to her throat that is slightly bruised from our own playing. Difference is, I know what the fuck I’m doing. William never should have attempted that shit without getting some training first.

I rise and walk over to Nat. She lifts her chin but doesn’t move away. My fingers drag along her throat and I steal a kiss. I don’t fucking know if she’ll bolt after this and I’ll be damned if I don’t have her taste on my lips if she does.

“He called me, frantic. Crying. Freaking the fuck out.” I cringe as I think of that night. “I showed up, found a scarf around her throat. I couldn’t loosen it. I knew she was dead, but performed CPR anyway. It was too late, though. She was gone.”

“But it was an accident, so you say. Why didn’t he come straight to the police? Why did you cover for him?” she demands, tears welling in her emerald eyes.

“William was worried about his career,” I tell her bluntly.

“And what about yours?” Her voice is shrill.

“I owed him. After what he did for Mom…” I stroke her hair from her face and kiss her again. And again. And again. “We can’t change what happened. It was an accident. I did what I could to protect my friend. The media would have destroyed him. I couldn’t let that happen.”

“But Kate?” she sobs.

“I’m sorry,” I murmur. “I tried, Nat. I really fucking tried. You were there for the trial. There were no signs of a struggle or rape. She suffocated during sex and it’s a fucking tragedy I wish I had the power to undo.”

She starts to cry harder. I tug her over to the bed and help her back into it. With her tucked under my arm, I whisper assurances and apologies into her ear as she cries for her friend. And when she’s all cried out, she speaks.

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