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‘I’ll be right over,’ he says and hangs up.
Putting my bouquet down on the table, I stare at it as I wait for Mike to make my home bird-free so that I can roll up my sleeves and set about returning my house to some semblance of order once again.
Not a moment later and Mike knocks at the door.
‘Woaw,’ he says when he sees the state of my living room.
‘Archibald’s handiwork.’
‘The mark of the cat.’
‘Quite.’
We go through to the kitchen and see that the bird is still fluttering wildly.
‘Shush, shush,’ Mike coos at our feathered friend. ‘Everything will be fine.’
He advances slowly on the bird making soothing noises, uttering calming words. The bird’s wings beat slower and slower until, eventually, he flops exhausted on the windowsill. Even I’m relaxing. While the bird is momentarily settled, Mike advances softly and cups the bird gently in his hands. It makes a vain attempt at flapping again.
‘Open the back door please, Janie,’ Mike says steadily. ‘Keep Archie inside. This little chap might well need a rest before he flies away and I don’t want Jaws here chasing after him for a farewell chew.’
‘Good point, well made,’ I say and go to grab the feline fiend.
But Archie is having none of it. Seeing that his fun is about to be thwarted, he makes a mad dash at Mike as I go to collect him in my arms and, claws extended, runs up my neighbour’s leg to have a final flail at his deadly foe. Perhaps he’s regretting nodding off on the job now.
‘Archie!’ I scold. Making a grab for the cat, I snatch him from Mike’s leg and the scream he emits tells me that the tearing of flesh is involved. ‘Naughty cat. Naughty, naughty cat.’
Small droplets of blood from two neat circles of five puncture wounds start to seep through Mike’s jeans. Archie’s lips curl in a smile.
‘The door. The door!’ Mike shouts. Somehow he still has his grip on the bird.
My friend is through it without hesitation and dashes into the garden, Archie is in hot pursuit. But I, for once, am smarter than the cat and as Mike hits the grass, I slam the door causing Archie to do a quick bit of back-pedalling or end up with a flattened face. He howls in protest as his exit is cut off.
Peering out of the glass, I watch as my neighbour tenderly lifts the totally traumatised bird into the lower branches of my now winter-bare cherry tree. I can almost feel its tiny heart beating from here.
Mike comes back to the door and, keeping Archie away with my foot, I let him inside. My neighbour dusts down his hands.
‘Nice job,’ I say.
‘All in a day’s work as a superhero,’ Mike quips.
‘How are the wounds?’
He looks down at his stained jeans. ‘I’ll live.’ He gives a mock wince. At least, I’m assuming it’s a mock wince. ‘I think.’
The blood is oozing nicely into the denim.
Shaking his head, he addresses my cat. ‘Man, you’ve got claws like Freddy Krueger.’ He wags a finger at the unapologetic Archie. ‘No dinner for you tonight, young man.’
My cat gives him a smug look that says, ‘Oh yeah? Watch this space.’ When he turns to me, the sweetest, most innocent face is reading, ‘Didn’t I do a great job, Mummy, protecting our home from intruders?’
‘Not that easily,’ I say to Archie, trying to sound stern.
The cat skulks off, acknowledging that the humans are ganging up on him and that, temporarily, he is beaten.
Chapter Fouteen
‘Thanks so much, Mike. I don’t know what I’d do without you. Can I make you a cup of tea or something?’
‘You get the kettle on,’ he suggests, ‘while I start cleaning up this mess.’
‘Oh no, you can’t do that. You’ve helped me out enough.’
Mike spreads his hands. ‘I’ve got nothing else planned, Janie. A bit of action with a J cloth seems quite attractive comparatively.’
‘You’re very kind.’ As I go to make some tea, I see him casting a wary eye over my bouquet. ‘I suppose I’d better put those in water.’ I pick up the roses and lift them into the sink, which I fill with water. The perfect vase for them is smashed on the living room floor, so another container of some sort will have to be pressed into hurried service.
‘I guess the date was a roaring success.’
‘Er . . .’ I’m not really sure how to answer that. ‘In my mind it was a hideous experience never to be repeated. I’m not exactly sure how the rose-sending has come to pass.’
‘Seems as if your date didn’t feel the same.’
‘It would appear not.’ I busy myself with the cups. ‘I was home so early that I was going to knock, but just as I came up your path, your light went off.’
