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“I’m not!” She retorted.
“Liar.”
She gasped. “You are rudely mistaken.”
“Then join me.”
With her animosity peaking, she spat out at him, “Now who is the crazy one?”
He actually smiled. “I never called you crazy.”
“You certainly are implying it.”
He looked suddenly serious. “I don’t think you’re crazy.”
This made her pause shortly. She herself wondered if at times she was indeed a raving lunatic. It was only rain after all. The logical part of her brain tried to reassure the irrational part that her paranoia was unfounded, that she had nothing to fear. But it didn’t make a smidgeon of difference. She couldn’t shake the feeling.
Beneath her chest, her pulse began that old familiar chaotic pounding. Why couldn’t he just drop it? Why couldn’t he just leave things as they were? Her body started trembling and she unconsciously rubbed her arms. She tried to take several deep shallow breaths to control the rising panic, but she recognized the signs. Knew what was about to happen. In desperation, she shot Ryan an imploring look. Silently begging him for help.
“It’s okay, Evelina.” He smiled at her in the rain. “You can trust me.”
This made her pause. With a sorrowful exclamation, she looked at him and their earlier conversation came back to mind. He had been honest about his intentions. That she could say about the man. And if she were being truthful with herself, she would admit that she did indeed trust him. Probably more than anyone she had ever met. But not with her emotions. He had created a deep sadness within her she couldn’t yet explain but somehow knew it had to do with the fact he could never return her feelings.
“I just want to go home.”
His shoulders drooped and he simply stared at her in the rain until at last he nodded before reentering the little nook only to sweep her back up into his arms and hurry off to the carriage. Though it was still raining, it had eased considerably yet this did not seem to slow his steps. She doubted it was on account of her obvious fear of being out in the rain. Rather she sensed he no longer wished to spend time with her and the sooner he put distance between them the better. Evelina tried to suppress the unhappiness this thought evoked. But somehow couldn’t manage to bring herself to it.
Sadly, the opinion of others was only one of the several anxieties that have plagued her for years. However, it wasn’t the fear of how Ryan saw her that caused this sudden bout of sorrow. Yes, it did trouble her, but it was the realization itself that she wou
ld lose him before he ever had the chance to know the real Evelina that hurt the most.
But who was she kidding? The fact was Evelina wasn’t capable of winning anyone over. Let alone a man with such caliber as Ryan Colby. Her insane phobias were doomed to force her to live a long miserable life alone.
They rode the distance back to her parent’s home in silence. The storm had ceased entirely by that point which Evelina was grateful for. The sound of rain pounding the carriage along with her distressed thoughts would have been enough to send her over the edge. The storm passed as quickly as it had arrived with the sun re-emerging after its path. As the carriage pulled up in front of her family home, she paused in her train of troubled thoughts to notice a rainbow arch over the little blue house like a colorful halo. She hadn’t seen a rainbow in years.
“Look how beautiful that is.” Her eyes lit up as she slid forward in her seat and stared at the view.
Ryan lowered his head to see past her shoulder and out the window. “Yes. I quite agree.”
She glanced back at him startled at how close his voice was to discover him merely inches from her face. But he was not staring out at the rainbow but at Evelina instead.
Uncomfortable with his close proximity, she scooted further away from him on the bench.
“How long has it been since you’ve seen a rainbow, Evelina?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Twelve years perhaps?”
Her eyes shifted and locked gazes with him. She didn’t like how he was always reading far too much into her. She much preferred to remain a closed book.
“Perhaps.”
He watched her quietly for a little while longer than asked softly, “What happened to you that day?”
She frowned. Hard. His watchful gaze was unnerving enough, but now he was treading in dangerous waters.
“I-I think I’d like to go in now.”
