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I was so happy that I gave love a chance with this man because he had been doing a damn good job at keeping me happy. Dre and I may not have been perfect, but we were practicing every day on being the best soulmates to each other that we could be. Who would have thought that that same thugged out nigga I met at his coming home party at the club would be the man that I popped out a set of twins for and was carrying another on the way, and someone who I was about to marry in a matter of weeks. It was funny as hell the cards that life will throw your way. I planned to spend eternity with this man. That’s it for now, y’all. Peace!
Jaquan
“Say I feel like going on
You know
I feel like going on
Going on
Say the storm may be raging and the stars
may seem too high
Lord
I feel like going on”
The sound of the choir singing as I sat front row at my father’s funeral soothed me a bit. It’s sad because as quickly as I had gotten to know him, is as quickly as he was taken away from me. I couldn’t even be selfish and ask God why. One because as a child, I was always taught to never question God, and two, this man lying in this casket looked at peace. I could tell that when he was around us, he was in lots of pain, and now he was finally able to rest.
It was unfortunate that Monae and I had to lose our father to AIDS, but I’m just glad that he was able to spend the last year with us, and I was able to get rid of all of those ill feelings that I had for him in my heart after all of these years. But I know one thing, the absence of him in my life as a child made sure I was always there for my two children. I never wanted them to grow up hating me and questioning why I was never there.
In attendance at the funeral were my dad’s other two daughters, Dominique and Denisha. They were younger than me and Monae, and a part of me wondered why my dad had chosen to raise them and not us. Hell, that was the past and I was over it but I was looking forward to having a relationship with them. Life was way too short to live as if I didn’t have other siblings existing, besides I’m pretty sure that it would make our father proud.
“You okay, baby?” Charlie asked me, after they had said one final prayer at the cemetery, and I dropped my white rose on his casket.
“I’m good, lil mama. I got the most beautiful wife in the world, the two prettiest babies. I’m good, baby,” I said, pulling her into me and giving her a hug.
I would think about my father every day, and I was going to miss him something serious because before he left this earth, the two of us had made a bond that couldn’t be broken.
And this was the life of Jaquan Hakeem Williams. I’ve been through some shit in life, but I didn’t let that shit have anything on my future. That’s my story, you either accept it or you don’t. I’m out. Peace and blessings.
“Keep your dream alive.
Understand to achieve anything
Requires faith and belief in yourself, vison,
Hard work, determination, and dedication.
Remember all things are possible for those who believe.
-Gail Devers
The end!!!
