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Before Sincere got locked up, I was in school full time. Having to go through the whole pregnancy by myself, I decided to not finish my last semester in school. I was only missing a few credits and then I would be graduating, but I never went back. It wasn’t like I stopped school altogether once I graduated high school. I was attending Broward College, but once Sincere was sentenced to do his two years, I pretty much just stopped going to school and never really thought about going back, until now.
Back to the matter at hand, I hadn’t even noticed that Breesha’s back was turned to me, deep conversation with a handsome ass nigga. He put me in the mindset of Nelly, when he was younger. He even had the two grilled fangs in his mouth and tattoos covering his arms, and from the tank that he was wearing, I could see that he had a shitload of tattoos on his chest as well. I don’t know what he was saying to my cousin, but from the way she was showing off those dimples, he had her all the way open. I was shocked that Breesha’s ass was even giving this nigga the time of day, because I swear this chick denies every nigga that tries to talk to her. I mean, fine ass niggas be trying to holla at my cousin, but she just wasn’t letting those niggas in, no matter what. I looked down at my clutch and I felt my phone vibrating. I pulled it out and it was my husband. I was not about to pick up this phone and have him hear all of this noise in my background, so I sent his ass to voicemail. I knew I would regret this later on, but this was a risk worth taking.
Around 1 a.m., we finally left the club and I was walking to the car with Breesha and her lil boo in the back. I jumped in the driver seat and waited for her to bring her ass on. I was already going to hear it from my husband and this bitch was taking forever, flirting in the damn parking lot. Sincere was calling me back to back, to the point where I ended up having to turn off my damn phone. I saw Breesha walking to the passenger side, and Mr. Mysterious opened the door up for her to get inside. And he was a gentleman–that was a plus.
Chapter 3: Breesha
Dontae was his name. Dontae Harris to be exact. We were at the club, and I was sitting at the bar with Nae when this fine ass nigga walked over to me and stood on the right of me, ordering a drink. Everything about him screamed “boss;” from the way he turned me around in my chair and slightly opened my legs, so that he could stand directly in front of me, to the way he drank from the shot of patron that was in his cup. Any other day, I would have slapped the shit out of a nigga if he even got too close to me, but I had let this nigga turn me around in my chair and I didn’t do shit about the situation. In fact, I was turned on about the fact that he saw something and he went after it. Most niggas were scared of my bad ass attitude, but this nigga could give two fucks about that. When he turned me around in my chair, he gave me a look, daring me to say something slick out of my mouth. While he was talking to me, I couldn’t help but notice that this nigga’s hygiene was perfect. His breath smelled like cool mint, and he had the perfect Colgate smile. His Tom Ford cologne lingered through the air, and if I wasn’t wet from when I felt his dick poking me in my lie from turning me around, I was definitely wet now. It’s like I couldn’t control myself. I didn’t even know his name at that point, but I was already ready to carry his babies.
The whole time we were sitting there, Dontae talked nothing but pure shit. He knew that I was going to be his girl and he didn’t even know my name yet. Every time I would say some slick shit, he hit my ass with a comeback ten times harder. I wasn’t used to these niggas being able to keep up with my slick ass mouth, but Dontae was giving my ass a run for my money. I could already tell that we were going to have problems in our future, because we were too much alike.
“What makes you so sure that I’m going to be your girl? How you know I’m not a lesbian or something?” I asked, fucking with him.
“The way those nipples poking out lil mama, I know damn well you ain’t no lesbian,” he pointed out, stepping closer to me. This nigga was invading my privacy, but I loved every second of it.
We continued talking for the rest of the night, until Nae tapped me and said she was ready to go. I’m pretty sure Sincere was blowing her phone up by now. I didn’t want to leave Dontae, but I know I had to since Nae was the one that had driven us here. Nae had already started the car and I was still in the parking lot, walking with Dontae. When we reached the car, he opened the door, lifted me up, and sat me down in the chair. When he did that, I felt his hardness on my ass for the second time tonight, and I wanted him to hold me in that position a little while longer. I didn’t even know shit about this man, but I knew I wanted him to myself already.
“This dick will fuck up your whole life ma,” he said, whispering in my ear.
I gave him a smirk as I settled down in my seat, “You let me be the judge of that.”
“Here lil mama, take my number,” he said, taking my phone from out of my lap. He typed his number in, saved it, and passed it back to me. I had no intention on calling him anytime soon. Yes, I wanted him, God knows I didn’t, but I wasn’t out to get my heart broken, and I had a feeling that’s what he would do in the end. This nigga was too fine, and I’m pretty sure he had bitches fighting over him on the daily, and I wasn’t up for fighting over no dick–I don’t care how good it was. I already knew that once I left, he was going to go right back in the club to flirt with some more bitches. Yeah, that’s exactly what he was going to do because as of now, his ass was too perfect, so he had to have a flaw somewhere.
After Dontae left and closed the door, I looked at Nae and she had a smirk on her face.
“What bitch?” I asked laughing, already knowing her ass was about to call me out on my shit.
“Oh nothing,” she said, pulling from out of the parking spot that we were in. “Y’all were cute though, do you plan on calling him?” she asked me.
“Hell no,” I said, looking at her like she was crazy.
“Girl, why not? That man was feeling you. You better snatch his ass up before another bitch do.”
“That’s fine,” I said, looking out of the window.
I didn’t even know this man, but I had already mustered up this feeling for him out of nowhere. Never in my life have I ever loved a man or have I ever been in love, and I guess you can say that my father was the reason for that. My dad really left his mark on me; it was because of him that I was afraid to be vulnerable and afraid to love. I was afraid that I would get left after being with a man for years, only for him to shit on me and start a family with someone else. My sperm donor–I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction and call him my dad–left my mom and I when I was only five years old. My mother loved that man unconditionally, only for him to leave like he didn’t invest so many years into a relationship with my mom.
At the age of five, I didn’t know what was going on with my mother; all I knew was that she was never happy. Every time I would see my mother, she was either crying or just sitting in her room staring at the damn wall. When I turned seven years old, I noticed that he would come around more, but he would never stay the night. I was young at the time, but I knew he didn’t love us because if he did, he wouldn’t have allowed my mother to suffer the way she did over him.
When I was ten years old, I came home from school to find my mother lying in the den, in a pool of her own blood. To be honest, I didn’t cry. I didn’t even shed a tear, because I felt like my mother stopped caring for me when he left. It’s like our relationship wasn’t the same, and she would constantly blame me for being the reason why he left. I was told that my mother killed herself, and that made me hate her ass even more. What type of woman would allow a man to have that much fuckin control over her? You would allow a man that walked away from his responsibilities cause you to end your life for him!
That alone was the reason why I never let anyone inside of my heart. The two people that I loved the most didn’t give a fuck about me. If my mother had cared for me, she would have still been here to this day! She wouldn’t have went out like a coward and killed herself, which led to me having to grow up without any guidance. I was forced to move in with Imani and her parents, and even though I was in the perfect household, I still hated it there. At the end of the day, I valued what Imani had because before my dad left us; that’s what we used to have. We used to be a loving family. I used to come home from school to see both parents; but I swear to you, life is so short and people can be taken away from you in a blink of an eye.
Over the years, I’ve been able to let go of the hat
e that I had in my heart for my mother for leaving me to have to grow up in this cold world without her. I’ll always love her, but I’ll never forget the day she chose to pretty much say fuck me because of a man that didn’t do shit for us. As far as my sperm donor, his ass can rot and die slowly with a sick dick. I didn’t miss his ass, and I did fuckin well by my damn self with neither of them helping me to get where I’m at right now.
Snapping back to reality, the rest of the ride back to my house was a quiet one. I was in my thoughts, trying to decide whether or not I should call Dontae. I didn’t want my cold heart to be the reason why I would miss out on something good. I needed to stop living through what my mom went through because in order for me to even get hurt, I would have to get into a relationship first.
When we pulled up to the house, Nae came inside and changed her clothes, and was on her way to get her ass cursed out by her husband. God knows I wouldn’t want to be a fly on the wall to see how that situation was going to play out.
I looked in Imani’s room, and she had fell asleep with the textbook laying on her chest. I walked in and removed it, and set it on her dresser and left. I closed her door on the way out and headed to my room. Tonight was an interesting night. Maybe or maybe not, I might have met my prince charming. The only way that I would be able to find out though, was if I decided to give him a call. I was going to give it some time though, because I didn’t want to come off as being thirsty.
Chapter 4: Imani
It was 6 p.m., and I was leaving my English class. I was so exhausted, because I had been at school since 11 a.m. this morning. I still had to drive over to the boutique to meet Breesha and set up the new hair that came in today. I didn’t want to leave her to do it by herself, so I told her yes, even though my body was screaming no. Every once in a while, I would help out at the shop when I would have some free time on my hands. It’s like I worked there too and I didn’t work there at the same time. I liked going to the store to help out but right now, all I felt like doing was going home, taking a hot ass shower, and climbing in my damn bed. When I pulled up to the boutique, I noticed Nae’s red BMW in the driveway.
Why the fuck she called me to help if Nae’s ass is already here, I thought to myself, getting out of my silver Pontiac G6.
