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"They don't count. You can't get hot and heavy in the middle of a war zone," she said.
"Please stop," I said, not really wanting to discuss my sex life with my little sister. I didn't want to tell her she was right, I hadn't been with anyone since Veronica, but I also didn't really want to tell her what a lot of other people got up to when we were deployed. When you put men and women together in one place for a long time, the inevitable happened. Sometimes with other service members, sometimes with locals, mostly consensual, but sometimes not. That was what nobody liked to bring up when they talked about deployed service members overseas.
"I'm just saying, you should go on a date. Start meeting people again."
"Tiffany, first you play real estate agent and then you play matchmaker? What gives? Why are you trying to get rid of me?"
"I'm not. I just thought you would maybe like to get into a normal routine. Meeting people, having normal relationships, and becoming a civilian again. I don't know what you saw over there or what they made you do. It's just... I've heard what happens to a lot of veterans when they come back home."
"Tiff, you have nothing to worry about, really," I insisted.
"It's still going to make me feel better if I know you're doing normal stuff and can still talk to people."
"What do you think happened over there?"
"Come on, Roman," she said sulkily. She was serious. I could tell she meant what she said when she said she was worried about me. I didn't want to tell her not to be because that wouldn't convince her.
"I'm fine. I swear. Just to show you. I'll go on this date with your work friend."
"She's great, you're gonna love her."
"Whoa, I said I would go on a date with her. No one said anything about love."
"Whatever, you know what I mean. She's a nice girl. I know you'll hit it off."
I admired her confidence, but the jury was out on that one. I didn't know who this person was that she was introducing me to, and besides, all I had agreed to have was a date. Just one. I had just gotten back and just gotten a house. I was still getting my feet back under me; I wasn't trying to date, get a girlfriend and shit. I needed to set myself up before I could start dating again.
That said though, dinner with a pretty girl... I wasn't going to say no to that. Yeah, deployment wasn't a sausage party, but the guys outnumbered the girls and since we weren't there to eat dinner, chat, and have a good time, spending time with a girl on a date would be nice. Maybe I had been out of the game too long.
Chapter Eight
Veronica
Summer used to be my favorite time of the year. Most people felt the same way, but I loved the free time. I always worked over summer, but I liked that I wasn't thinking about school all the time. My mind could wander, and I could think about the future, daydream, and fantasize. The looser days were a relief after the busy semesters; I always looked forward to the vacation.
That was until last summer, of course. Summer last year came right on the heels of Roman dumping me and the good weather hadn't been enough to drag me out of the post-break up oblivion I disappeared into for a month and a half. The more I thought about it, the worse it seemed to dump someone right before summer, go off and have a great time, while they cried alone in bed for weeks.
I had gone back home that summer, not that it ended up making that much of a difference to what I did all day. I would just fall apart and spontaneously burst into tears – it wa
s pathetic. Roman not talking to me at all made it better and worse at the same time. It had been way too sudden. We weren't just a couple, we were friends, and the fact that he wasn't there anymore just to talk to or share time with had been agonizing.
This summer was going to be different. As hard as I felt that I wouldn't even make it out alive, I was fine. That was all in the past. Ancient history. I didn't have to think about that because it wasn't going to happen again. I was single, well, single-ish, my GPA was still perfect, and I only had one more year of college left before I graduated with my degree.
I couldn't wait. Literally, I couldn't wait to stop being a student. I liked it and I was good at it, but the structured days and semesters of student life were getting to me. It was starting to feel restrictive, and all I wanted was a chance to finally get out there. I had worked throughout college, partly paying for my tuition and partly putting money away to travel. I had a whole laundry list of places I wanted to see before I decided to settle down and start a family.
It was a little after nine when I got out of bed. I thought about French toast for breakfast, but that sounded like a lot of work. I wanted something fast, so oatmeal it was. I cut up an apple and put it in a pot with some sugar and water so it could soften up enough for me to add the oats. Since moving into my own place, I stopped having a microwave in the house, sort of like an incentive to eat like a real adult and actually cook instead of nuking Hot Pockets. It had worked so far. There was no such thing as being too busy to feed yourself properly. Since it was summer, I'd have a lot more time now anyway, unless I took summer classes.
Were any of the courses I needed for my major available this summer? I wondered. I wasn't sure, but now I wanted to check. I could end up taking some of the strain off my senior year. I would be sacrificing time that was meant to be taken off, but I could potentially finish my required courses earlier. Depending on how it worked out, I could end up saving myself a whole semester. My social life was not important enough to me to prioritize over school. It didn't sound like the worst idea.
I ate my breakfast clicking through the student portal of my college's website. The doorbell rang as I was stacking my washed dishes. Besides my building supervisor or Tiffany, I wasn't sure who else I could expect at this time of the day. I answered it.
"Sean," I said, all the expectation I had evaporating the moment I met his blank, brown eyes.
"Hey, babe," he said, walking in. He held the back of my neck and kissed me.
"What are you doing here?" I asked. He was dressed like he had somewhere to go, which was always a surprise. His button up shirt actually looked like someone had ironed it for him and his face was freshly shaven.
"What? Did you have plans or something?" he asked, walking straight into the kitchen.
