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We walked down the slope towards the house, and I glanced at Zack. “Do you ever go inside?” I asked.
“No,” I replied. “After Dad moved into the clubhouse… I stayed back for a few months. And then I moved into the clubhouse too.”
“Couldn’t stay behind, huh?”
“At first, I thought it would be nice to have the house to myself,” Zack nodded. “I don’t know; it just didn’t feel right stayin
g on when Dad had left.”
We were standing right outside the house, staring up at its remains. “Do you think you’ll ever make use of this house again?” I asked.
Zack looked thoughtfully at the front door and sighed. “I don’t know… I should do something with it. Otherwise, it’s just sitting here, old and forgotten. I could do it up so that the boys can sleep over maybe… there’ll be more room for everyone.”
I nodded. “That sounds like a good idea.”
“I don’t know that it does,” Zack said. “Most of the older guys have families or partners. They’re not going to end up here…”
He seemed pensive, but there was no sadness in his tone. It felt like he had resigned himself to the inevitable. This club was family to him, but he was also acknowledging that the other men had real families. They had wives and children who needed them.
“Do you want to go inside?” Zack asked suddenly, turning to me.
“I… seriously?”
“Yeah.”
“I thought you haven’t been in there for a while?”
“I haven’t,” he admitted. “But there’s no reason not to go inside. I don’t believe in ghosts anyway.”
“I do,” I said.
“You do?” Zack turned to me.
“Well… yeah,” I nodded. “I think very few people actually see the ghosts, but I think it’s possible that people leave behind an imprint of themselves.”
“To finish unfinished business?” Zack asked.
“More like to watch over the people they care about.”
Zack smiled. “That’s a beautiful notion.”
“You think I’m crazy, don’t you?” I asked.
“No,” he said quietly. “I don’t think you’re crazy. It’s nice that you have faith in things. I don’t.”
“You don’t have faith in anything?” I asked.
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “Faith implies that there’s some sort of cosmic reason for everything. Nothing happens by chance; everything has a purpose and a meaning. I’ve always felt like life itself is one big accident. Things happen every day without any reason. There’s no order or meaning; there’s just chaos and random occurrences.”
“Hmm…”
Zack turned to me with a smile. “Not the most optimistic viewpoint.”
“Well, I didn’t expect you to think any differently,” I admitted. “No offense, but you don’t look like the optimistic type.”
I laughed. “Come on… let’s see what the inside of this ruin looks like.”
The door was sort of wedged shut, and Zack had to push it open with the side of his body. There was nothing inside the house… not even furniture. It was just empty rooms filled with cobwebs and not much else. I closed my eyes for a second and imagined what it would have been like ten or twenty years ago with painted walls and curtains on the windows and the sound of people living amongst its walls.
