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“That's nice,” she said. The table silenced as the waiter placed our drinks in front of us. He went from each of us collecting our orders and left again. We sat in silence as we munched on the bread left on the table. It was an awkward silence but not one I was willing to break at the moment.
“So, have you lived here all of your life?” Ryan asked unable to bear the silence for one more minute. He was looking at my mother and she sat her bread down on the table, took her glass into her hand lifted it and gulped some water. I knew the question wouldn't be that hard to answer but she was over dramatic if nothing else.
“Yes. My parents are from here and I came back here after… well after Em went to school.” I looked over at Luke and pleaded with him to change the conversation.
“I grew up close to here as well. It really is a beautiful place to live.” He said, squeezing my hand in his.
“Where did you grow up?” she turned her gaze to him.
“About an hour east of here.”
“We've lived in Pine Valley all our lives,” Ryan added.
“You two have known each other a long time.”
“Since diapers.” Ryan grinned. “He was a cute, fat baby.” He pointed across the table. I smiled as Luke moved uncomfortably in his chair. He didn't like to be the center of attention.
“He started losing his baby fat in eighth grade.” Ryan shoved a piece of bread into his mouth, still looking at my mother.
“That's about when Em lost hers.” I sunk down in my seat.
“Bet she was just as beautiful then as she is now,” Luke said. He leaned over and kissed my temple out of instinct before looking around the table at everyone. The food arrived just in time to save us from an embarrassing visit to our childhoods. My chicken looked great, and I dug in, not because I was starving but more because my mother hated when people talked with food in their mouths. If I kept my mouth full of food, then I wouldn't have to talk to her as much. She eyed Luke more than once, and when her eyes caught the tip of a tattoo peeking out of the sleeve of his shirt, she visibly cringed a little. We finished a rather uncomfortable dinner and said our goodbyes.
“I wasn't going to tell my mom Luke was my boyfriend,” I snapped at Ryan when we walked out to the truck. Luke was holding my hand as we walked and had released it to open the truck door.
“Why not?” Ryan looked over to where I stood, waiting on Luke.
“Because she’s always weird about guys I date.” I wanted to be honest, but I didn't want to hurt Luke’s feelings either. I knew what he had to offer me, but I also knew that my mother would never approve of him simply because he didn't make six figures. She never understood why I worked when I didn't have to. There were plenty of men out there to take care of me in her opinion.
While that had been her goal, it had never been mine. I wanted a love like my Granddad and Mimi. I wanted a love that gave me butterflies forever, not just in the beginning. I guess seeing Mom miserable at home while my dad worked all the time had made me hard. She acted like she was happy, but the only time I saw her smile, like really smile, was when she got to get dressed up and go to parties with him. When he left her, she hadn't been prepared to be independent. I wasn't ever going to be that woman; maybe that's why I was so hell bent on taking care of myself. I could admit I had gone a little overboard, but I was going to protect myself so I didn't end up a fifty-year-old woman who had never worked, nor taken care of herself.
“Well, she should be weird about the men in your life, she’s your mom.” I looked away and found Luke waiting on me to climb in the truck. He smiled and said softly. “There will never be a man good enough for you in your mother's eyes.” He kissed me and climbed in behind me. I snuggled against him as we headed back to the RV and my truck. It was hard not to get caught up in the future and what might come our way. I was trying my best to just live in the moment.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Luke
Emerson left to go to her grandparents after dinner. As much as I wanted her, I didn't want to rush it. Things had just begun, and I wanted them to continue. We headed home early in the morning, and after a quick run, we started working around the property.
“I like the way she looks on you,” Ryan smirked as we loaded two end tables into the back of the truck.
I smiled. “It feels really good,” I admitted. I had thought I’d known what it felt like to be serious about someone, but after my last relationship, I’d closed off my heart; I just hadn’t realized it. Emmy had a way of making me feel again, and I wasn't disappointed.
“I just like that you aren't a grumpy ass all the time,” Ryan said.
“I wasn't that bad.”
Ryan laughed in my face and shook his head. “Bad is an understatement. But seriously, it's good to see you like this. I can only imagine what you are thinking about when you get all doe-eyed and smiley like a chick, but it’s good anyway.” He walked around the truck and sat on the tailgate.
“So what was the deal with Chris?”
I knew this line of question had been coming. He had walked away with Emerson and hadn't heard the rest of what was said.
“Pretty much what you already know. He said he has been with her and couldn't wait until the next time. And he said it in the most disrespectful way; that’s what lit me up more than anything.”
“I see.” He looked up at me. “Did you believe him?”
“She said she’s never been with him, and that’s good enough for me.”
