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Farwol bites harder, and that, I do like. I groan at the pain and clench my thighs tightly closed, protecting myself. Farwol chuckles; my movement didn’t escape his notice. I think he knows exactly what he’s doing to me, exactly how he’s affecting me, and I think he likes it.
I think he likes the way I’m a little turned on by d
anger.
I think he likes that I’m a little excited by pain.
The feeling that something is wrong with me floats through my body, but I try to squash it. There’s no time for embarrassment right now. There’s no time to be ashamed. There’s no time to be worried or uncomfortable with what’s happening.
Right now, all I need to do is focus on obeying Farwol’s every command. I just need to focus on doing exactly what he desires of me.
Then everything will be okay.
He moves me back to the bed and pulls away. For a moment, I mourn the loss of his touch. He’s only a foot away, but suddenly, that seems so far.
“Turn around and put your hands on the bed, Evelyn.” I swallow hard, but do as he asks. The blanket is soft beneath my hands and the wooden floor is chilly beneath my feet. The difference in texture overwhelms my senses as I wait in anticipation to see what he’s going to do to me.
I’m not sure if I want to know what he’s going to do to me.
I’m not sure if I’m going to survive it.
I hear Farwol moving around. I think he’s taking his clothes off. His shoes hit the floor and there’s a rustle of fabric, but then nothing. He doesn’t start touching me, doesn’t start speaking.
Is he watching me?
Is he looking at me?
I’ve never been this open, this vulnerable to anyone’s gaze before. I’m not sure if my legs should be closed or open. Should I move my feet? Should I lean over more? Should my breasts be against the blanket or should they be dangling?
“Don’t over-think,” Farwol’s voice cuts through the air. “You look stunning. Do you know that?”
“No, sir,” I whisper.
“Have you ever been with a man, Evelyn?” His voice sounds closer now. He’s nearer. I wonder if he’s going to touch me because I really want him to touch me. I want his hands on me again. I want his tongue on my skin. I want to feel his body connect with mine.
I’ve never wanted anything as bad as I want Farwol in this moment and I’m not sure whether I should stay quiet or fall to my knees and beg him to take me. I don’t know where I want to go or what I want to do, but I know Farwol knows, and I trust him to get me there.
I have the feeling that if I let him, and if I please him, that Farwol will make me fly, and that’s kind of fantastic.
“I’ve never been with a man before,” I tell him.
“What about kissing?”
“Never.”
“This is your first time,” he says, and then he touches me. His hands are on the backs of my thighs and I feel his breath against my spine. He presses his lips to me and it just makes me more wet, more anxious. I can feel a need within my core rising. My thighs are slick with desire and he touches me there.
“Yes,” I whisper. “Although, I’m guessing you’ve been with women before,” I add, feeling a little brave, a little curious.
He chuckles in response and moves his hands the rest of the way up my thighs. He settles one hand between my legs and begins to stroke me there. I bite my lip and lose all rational thought at the touch. It’s the most incredible thing I’ve ever felt and somehow, I can’t help but wonder why I’ve never done this before.
I never knew it could be like this.
“Don’t move,” he says, and he keeps touching me. Forwal strokes my body over and over and over. I forget everything except his hand on me. All thoughts of my day fade away. I’m not worried about the village anymore. I’m not missing my father. I’m not wondering why he borrowed money from Forwal or why he won’t pay.
All I’m doing is hoping this moment never ends.
My heart soars and my body begins to sing. The feeling starts between my legs but spreads to my core, to my very being.
