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“Tell me you don’t feel the same, Hayden. Tell me I’m being crazy and I’ll leave. Tell me you don’t want me, that you aren’t completely in love with me, that I’m not the one who makes your heart sing. You tell me all of that, and I’ll go, and we can pretend today never happened.”
I look up at Gaz and I see an eagerness in his eyes I’ve never seen before. I see a passion, a depth he’s kept locked away. I see something burning there that I want more of.
I want all of him.
“I can’t tell you that, Gaz, because I love you, too.”
He doesn’t kiss me yet. He just looks at me, and I start to tear up a little bit, because I’ve never been the lucky girl, the brave girl. I’ve never been someone life shone favorably upon. My journey has been hard and treacherous and full of pain, but Gaz makes me feel innocent once more.
When he touches me, I know that everything is going to be okay. The world is set right when I’m in his arms.
“Hayden, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to hear you say those words.” He strokes my cheek. “I must be dreaming because you’re so perfect. How could you ever love a fool like me?”
“You’re my Gaz,” I say simply, and then I lean up and kiss him, pressing my lips gently to his. Our first kiss is soft, slow. It’s sensual. I feel the passion burning deep in my belly, the desire for more, but I keep that locked up for now. Right now, I just want this kiss. I just want this moment.
Gaz kisses me tenderly, and I realize he’s been waiting just as long for this moment as I have. He kisses me like there’s no tomorrow, like I’m the only thing he needs to live, and then he stops and pulls me close to him once more.
We sit together, embracing on the couch, and I close my eyes as I rest against him.
Gaz loves me.
He loves me.
And I am safe.
Chapter 6
Gaz
I shouldn’t be holding her, touching her, kissing her.
I shouldn’t be with Hayden because she’s so perfect and I am not.
I have secrets she could never imagine and a past she wouldn’t believe, but right now, none of that matters. In this moment, all that matters is that we’re here together. I’ll need to tell her who I am – who I really am – soon. There will come a time when it will be necessary, but right now, I just want to be me.
Is it so wrong that I just want to be Gaz: the lawyer?
What’s the problem with just wanting to be Gaz: Hayden’s best friend?
I don’t want to be Gazley anymore. I haven’t wanted that for a long time. There’s a reason I came to Sapphira so long ago, but I don’t want to talk about that with Hayden right now. I don’t want to ruin the moment.
Maybe that’s not fair to her, though. Hayden is a very private person and me? My life is complicated, messy. There is a part of me that I’ve hidden away, a part of me I hope never comes to the surface, but it will. That’s the way life works. I should tell her before we get too involved, before we get too close
But then she kisses me, and I forget about everything except the way Hayden tastes. Kissing her clears my mind and takes me away from my troubles. When her lips are pressed to mine, I’m not worried about Trevor or the Orchidian police. I’m not worried about my family or my upbringing. I’m not worried about all of the things I left behind.
When Hayden is touching me, somehow all of my problems just disappear and I am left wrapped in the arms of the most beautiful woman on the planet.
She kisses me, and I feel complete.
She moves so she’s straddling me on the couch, and I grip her hips as she grinds against me, rubbing her body over mine. I’m hard for her, and she can definitely feel it, but I’m not embarrassed. Any man would be lucky to have Hayden Fox rubbing on them and right now I’m the luckiest fucking man on the planet.
“You are so damn perfect,” I groan.
“I’m nothing compared to you, Gaz.”
My name on her lips sounds like perfection, like heaven, and I kiss her more. Slowly, daringly, I run my hands up and down her sides. Hayden stiffens for a second and I slow down, but then she relaxes beneath my touch and I continue to feel her body. She’s so soft, so delicate. She is everything I am not, and I love that about her.
When my hands make their way up to cup her breasts, she moans.
