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If I could get Sklar to drop the charges against Sally, and we had a sympathetic judge, I could save Sally the expense of a second bond. 'You're not going anywhere,' I said to Sally. 'I don't need to bring you in today. I'll talk to Sklar and see what I can do about getting the charges dropped.'
'No shit!' Snap.
'You better clean up your mouth, or you're gonna lose that hand,' Lula said to Sally. 'You're gonna amputate yourself.'
'F-f-fudge,' Sally said.
Grandma looked down at her watch. 'You're going to have to take me home now. I have a beauty-parlor appointment this afternoon, and I don't want to be late. I got a lot of ground to cover today what with the shooting and all.'
This was a good deal for me because the negotiation with Marty
Sklar would go better without Grandma present. In fact, I'd prefer to do it without Lula but I didn't think that was going to happen. I pointed the Buick toward the Burg and motored across town. I dropped Grandma off in front of my parents' house. My sisters car was still in the driveway.
They're planning the wedding,' Grandma said. 'Ordinarily I'd be right there, but it looks to me like this is going on for days. They spent two hours this morning talking about what kind of suit Mr
Cutie Uggums was going to wear. I don't know how your mother does it. That woman has the patience of a saint.'
'Who's Mr Cutie Uggums?' Lula wanted to know.
'Albert Kloughn. He and Valerie are getting married.'
'That's scary,' Lula said.
Melvin Biablokis Toyota dealership took up half a block on South
Broad Street. It wasn't the biggest or the best dealership in the state, but according to Burg gossip it made enough money to send
Melvin and his wife on a cruise every February and to give a job to his son-in-law.
I parked in the area reserved for customers, and Lula and I went searching for Sklar.
This here's a butt-ugly showroom,' Lula said. They should buy some new carpet. And what's with the nasty plastic chairs? For a minute there I thought I was back at the office.'
A guy in a sports coat ambled over, and it took me a moment to realize it was Marty Sklar. He was shorter than I remembered. His hair was balding. He was wearing glasses. And his six-pack stomach had turned to a keg. Marty wasn't aging well.
'Stephanie Plum,' Marty said. 'I remember you. Joe Morelli used to write poems on bathroom walls about you.'
'Yeah. I'm living with him now.'
Sklar touched his index finger to my lip. Then all those things he said must be true.'
He'd caught me flat-footed. I wasn't expecting the touch. I slapped his hand away, but it was too late. I had Marty Sklar cooties on my lip. Yuk. I needed mouthwash. Disinfectant. I was going to rush home and take a shower. Maybe two showers.
'Hey,' Lula said. 'Don't you touch her. Did she say you could touch her? I don't think so. I didn't hear her give you permission.
You keep your nasty-ass hands to yourself.'
Sklar cut his eyes to Lula. 'Who the hell are you?'
I'm Lula. Who the hell are you?'
I'm Marty Sklar.'
'Hunh,' Lula said.
I tried not to think about the lip cooties and pushed forward.
'Here's the thing, Marty. I want to talk to you about Sally Sweet.'
