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Lou Delvina was a local mobster and a very scary guy. Diesel and I had a run-?in with him not too long ago, and I wasn’t thrilled about the idea that I was indirectly involved with him again.
“So your target is lucky, rides horses, likes green pants, and isn’t smart. Anything else?” I asked Diesel.
“He talks to animals. Two-?way conversations,” Diesel said.
“Like the horse whisperer and the pet psychic on television.”
“Whatever.”
“Can you talk to animals?” I asked him.
“Honey, I can barely talk to humans.”
Stephanie Plum 13.5 - Plum Lucky
Chapter 3
The elevator door opened toward the end of the hallway, and Snuggy stepped out. His eyes locked onto Diesel and me sitting on the floor and widened. “You!” Snuggy said.
Diesel got to his feet. “Surprise.”
Snuggy turned and punched the down button and clawed at the closed elevator doors.
“Cripes, that’s so pathetic,” Diesel said. “Stop clawing at the elevator and come over here.”
“Faith and begorrah, I can’t. My sainted mother is dying. I need to go to her bedside.”
Diesel cut his eyes to me. “Add fake Irish accent and pathological liar to the list.”
“That cuts to the quick,” Snuggy said.
“I have a file on you,” Diesel said. “Your birth name is Zigmond Kulakowski, you were born in Staten Island, and your mother died ten years ago.”
“I feel Irish,” Snuggy said. “I’m pretty sure I’m a leprechaun.”
Diesel was hands on hips, looking like he’d heard this before.
“It doesn’t say leprechaun in your file. And here’s some bad news—a closet full of green pants doesn’t make you a leprechaun.”
“I’m Unmentionably lucky.”
“Yeah, and I’m Unmentionably randy, but that doesn’t make me a goat.”
I stood and moved next to Diesel. “I want to know about the money my grandmother found. The money that belonged to Lou Delvina.”
Snuggy slumped a little. “I needed cash, and I heard Delvina had a safe filled with numbers money. I mean, if you have to steal something, steal something that’s already dirty, right? I know Delvina works his operation out of a car wash on Hamilton and Beacon Street, so I went to the car wash just as it was getting ready to open for business. And here’s the lucky part. Everyone, including Delvina, was around back, looking at a broken water valve. The door to the office was wide open. I went in, saw the duffel bag sitting all by itself on the front desk, looked inside, saw the money, and walked out with it. I set the bag on the car roof while I looked for my keys, and then I forgot about it and drove away. I guess the bag slid off when I turned the corner. I came back and saw the old lady dragging it down the street. I tell you, some people have no scruples. I was perfectly nice, explaining to her how I lost the bag, and she told me to kiss off. And then she called me some rude names!”
“She said you couldn’t identify the amount of money in the bag.”
“I hadn’t counted it. I didn’t know how much there was. I’d only just stole it. Faith and begorrah.”
“You say ‘faith and begorrah’ again, and I’m going to hit you,” Diesel said.
“You can’t hit me,” Snuggy said. “I’m old, and I’m half your size.”
“Yeah, it’d be embarrassing,” Diesel said, “but I think I could force myself to do it.”
Snuggy shuffled foot to foot. “Well, anyway, the money’s mine. And I want it back.”
