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“Well, as you can see the one she’s got isn’t in perfect condition,” Lula said.
Gaylord looked at the car and grimaced. “Tragic,” he said.
“Exactly,” Lula agreed. “So she needs something right away. We don’t want something leaking vital body fl
uids like this one. And we don’t want something with a big dent in it like this one. And it would be desirable if the backseat wasn’t a mold factory.”
“No problem so far,” Gaylord said.
“She works with me in the bounty hunter business, so she needs four doors so she can chuck the bad guys into the backseat. It could be a sedan or a SUV.”
Gaylord nodded. “Noted.”
“She don’t want it too old, and I ride around in it sometime so it should be shiny and have a good sound system.”
“Goes without saying,” Gaylord said. “You got a color in mind?”
“I’m partial to red,” Lula said, “but I guess we could be flexible on that one.”
“And how much you got to spend?”
“She don’t want to go over five thousand.”
“Okay, I might have to work a little, but I might find something.”
“Gaylord is a specialist middleman,” Lula said to me. “You tell him what you want and then he finds it for you.”
“Anything else?” Gaylord asked.
“She wants it legal,” Lula said. “You know, with a VIN and papers and all that shit.”
“All my cars come with papers,” Gaylord said. “And we’ll make sure it has everything looking legal.”
“What did I tell you?” Lula said to me. “He’s a sweetie, right?”
I noticed he’d said everything would look legal, and it occurred to me that looking legal might be different from being legal. I glanced back at my SUV and gave an involuntary shiver. It would never make it back across the river. It was a miracle I’d been able to drive it this far. Okay, so he looked like a nice man. And if I harp on the legal issue he might get insulted, right? I wouldn’t want to insult one of Lula’s friends. And, honestly, did I even care? I gave up a sigh. Of course I cared. I didn’t want to be involved in a crime, and I didn’t want to encourage crime. On the other hand, I needed a car. And who was I to prejudge this businessman?
“What about my current car?” I asked. “What’s it worth?”
Gaylord cut his eyes to the Explorer. “Fifty.”
“Fifty dollars?” I said. “That’s all you’ll give me for a trade-in?”
“No,” he said. “That’s what I’ll charge you to haul it to the junkyard.”
“So when can we expect her new car?” Lula asked.
“I’ll get Wayne working on it right away,” Gaylord said. “Where do you want it delivered?”
“You could call my cellphone, and I’ll let you know where we’re at,” Lula said.
“We need full payment when we deliver,” Gaylord said to me. “And I only take cash. Eliminates overhead, if you know what I mean.”
Oh boy.
I emptied out the Explorer, and Lula drove us back to Trenton.
“Now what are we going to do?” Lula wanted to know.
