AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I had authority as a bail bonds agent to break into a house if I felt my felon was inside. I used this privilege only under extreme circumstances. It was dangerous, and I wasn’t especially talented at kicking a door down. In this case, I also couldn’t get excited about finding two dead people. Or, for that matter, destroying a window or a door only to discover that Judy and Johnny were out grocery shopping.
“Hang for a little while longer,” I said to Lula. “I’m going to talk to the neighbor.”
Houses on either side of Judy Chucci’s were normal. Small patches of grass that served as front yards. Neatly maintained. No gnomes.
I rang the bell on the house to the left of Judy’s, and a young woman came to the door with a baby under her arm.
“I’m looking for Judy,” I said. “She’s not answering her door, and the house looks deserted. Have you seen her lately?”
“She left early this morning,” the woman said. “She got back together with her fruitcake ex-husband, and they went on a pre-re-wedding honeymoon. She came over and asked me to take care of her gnomes. She said the one with the bad eye was feeling anxious about the fruitcake moving back in.”
“Do you know where they went?”
“Hawaii.”
I went back to Lula and Bob and took a deep breath. I was in financial doo-doo. I’d maxed out my credit card on the Florida trip. I had five dollars left in my pocket. And Big Blue guzzles gas faster than I can pump it in. I needed the capture money from Johnny.
“Good news and bad news,” I said to Lula. “The good news is that they aren’t dead. The bad news is that they’re in Hawaii.”
“That’s what happens when you be a Good Samaritan,” Lula said. “It’s like ordering food at the drive-thru. You never know when they’re going to short you on the fries.”
TWENTY-THREE
I DROPPED LULA and Bob at the office and drove to my parents’ house. Grandma was waiting at the door. I waved to her and she was off the porch and down the sidewalk before I had a chance to shut the engine off.
“I know where I want to go,” Grandma said. “I went to one of them rescue websites, and I found a dog. The website said he was going to be up for adoption at the Petco store on Route 33. We gotta get there before someone else nabs him. I got my checkbook, my credit card, and $235 in mad money I’ve been hiding from your mother. I had more, but I spent it on the Florida trip.”
“Is it a puppy?”
“Almost. He’s four years old, but he looks like a puppy. He’s white and brown spotted, and he has floppy ears. It said his name is Duffy, but I’m going to call him Henry. I always wanted a dog named Henry.”
We walked into the store a couple minutes after it opened, and Grandma went straight to the adoption area in the front. There were several cats in cages and two small dogs. One of them was Duffy.
“What kind of dog is this?” I asked the attendant.
“He’s a mix,” she said. “He belonged to an elderly man who had to give him up when he went into a nursing home. If I had to make a guess I’d say he was part Maltese or Havanese.”
“He’s the one I want,” Grandma said. “I saw him on your website, and I knew right away that he was the one.”
“He’s had all his shots and he’s neutered,” the woman said.
“How much does he weigh?” I asked her.
“Nine pounds.”
“My pocketbook weighs more than that,” Grandma said.
An hour later we were out of the store and back in Big Blue. Henry had a new red collar and leash, a dog bed, dog bowls, dog food, a bunch of dog toys, a dog toothbrush and toothpaste, a brush and comb, and a tag shaped like a dog bone with his name and Grandma’s cellphone number on it.
“Does Mom know about this?” I asked Grandma.
“I might have forgot to tell her,” Grandma said.
Henry was happy, sitting on Grandma’s lap, and Grandma was looking out the window.
“There’s another one of those protests up ahead,” Grandma said. “I can’t make out what they’re protesting, but one of them looks like a zombie.”
The protesters were in front of a new bakery, and one of the sign carriers looked like it might be the zombie version of Zero Slick. Under any other circumstances, I would have stopped, but I had Grandma and her new dog with me. And to further complicate things, Grandma was probably carrying and would like the chance to shoot a zombie.
