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“I don’t feel it’s much of a risk. I can easily outrun you. And to be honest, the game is getting boring. I’m thinking of turning myself in and getting the whole court thing over and done. It’s my first offense, and there weren’t any high-end items involved. I expect I’ll get a slap on the wrist.”
“Why do you shoplift?” I asked him. “Why don’t you get a real job?”
“This is a real job. I average a yearly salary of mid-six figures.”
“But why shoplifting?”
“I’m good at it. I started doing it in high school as a stunt and discovered I had a real talent for it.”
“Wouldn’t you like to do something else? Move up the ladder?”
“No.”
“You have no dreams? No aspirations?”
“No. I like what I’m doing.”
“It’s illegal.”
“Yes. That’s unfortunate.”
“What about if you get married and have kids? What will you tell them?”
“I don’t know. I suppose that could be a game changer.”
We had a couple beats of silence while we thought about that.
“So, why don’t you like this red dress?” I asked him.
“It’s too short. It’s going to hit your leg in an odd spot and be unflattering. The color isn’t wonderful for your complexion. You would look best in a blue red. This is an orange red. And finally, I don’t like the cut of the neckline. I would like to see you in a scoop neck.”
“Wow. That’s amazing. I looked at it and all I saw was that it was cute. Your mother thinks you’re a personal shopper. Maybe that’s your true calling.”
“I have a couple clients, but I do it more as a personal favor than a profession. It’s just not as satisfying as shoplifting.”
I put the red dress back on the rack. “What dress would you suggest?”
He pulled out a deep blue silk shirtwaist. “It doesn’t have a scoop neck, but it’s very classy and at the same time it’s sexy because of the way the silk drapes and moves. It’s a little expensive but I can put it in my bag for you.”
“No! I wouldn’t want you to do that.” I took the dress from him. “It’s nice, but I’m not sure about the style.”
“Try it,” he said. “I think you’ll be surprised.”
I tried the dress on, and it was perfect. It felt elegant and sexy, and it was comfortable. I put my baggy jeans back on, left the dressing room, and Carol was gone. Vanished. Crap. Truth is, I wasn’t that surprised. And I didn’t much care, although it would have been fun to do more shopping with him. I bought the dress and was pulling out of the shopping center parking lot when my mother called.
“Usually we see you and Joseph for dinner on Fridays,” she said. “Last week was a wash because . . . you know. So, I’m just checking before we set the table.”
“Sure, we’ll be there for dinner,” I said. “I’m almost positive.”
“Six o’clock,” she said. “We’re having pot roast.”
I hung up and called Morelli. “Dinner at six o’clock at my parents’ house?”
“Sounds good. Gazarra told me about Grandma. He made me promise not to tell anyone.”
“He’s the best. I also brought Charlie Shine in. I was hoping for no bail, but the judge chose to set a super high amount instead.”
“I heard. Shine’s lawyer is looking for money. I’m told he’s liquidating some of Shine’s assets so Shine can post his own bond.”
