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Sweat dripping down my temples and my cheeks flushed, I walked back into World Cup with purpose. My heart beat hard, faster than usual. I had so much adrenaline pumping through me I was wired and ready to get back in the gym. Kova spotted me immediately and I smiled. There was something in his gaze that just felt like home. His forehead was creased, and I strode toward the locker room to wipe myself down and change.
"I said two miles."
I dug out some water from my bag. "I did do two miles."
"Not possible. You were gone for less than twenty minutes. You are usually running for at least thirty."
My back was still to him. Shrugging, I said, "I ran fast and regained my focus like you said."
"Get rid of that attitude you have. I will not put up with it."
I didn't have an attitude. He had an attitude. "Okay, Coach."
I wasn't going to argue with him.
Exhaling a long breath, I turned around to face him. He was studying me a little too intensely and it bothered me, but only because I didn't want him to dig. It wasn't that I didn't want him to ever know about my illness, I just didn't want him to know right now. Once everything was all said and done, and I’d achieved my goal, then I would tell him. Until then, I had to be careful not to slip up.
"So we are back to that again? Coach?" he asked me, eyes narrowing.
I took a gulp of water and nodded, trying not to be aware of how much that disturbed him. How sterile it was for us. I wasn't just Adrianna, and he wasn't just Coach. We were Ria and Kova, and we both knew that.
"That is too bad. We are not taking a step back."
Staying quiet, I placed my bottle back in my locker and grabbed my leotard and a fresh sports bra. I pulled off my tank top and balled it up and threw it into my bag. I hooked my thumbs into my shorts and leaned forward, about to pull them down when I realized Kova was still standing there.
I glanced over my shoulder. Our eyes met. The heat in his stare stunned me.
"What?" When he didn't respond, I said, "I'm trying to get changed. You can't be in here, Coach."
I smirked. His nostrils flared. I realized I liked to call him Coach when I was mad. This was how we roused each other. It was a game and I loved it, and I found I couldn't stop myself from doing it every single opportunity I was given. A perilous game that came with no winner or end in sight.
"What is going on with you today? Is something wrong?"
"Nothing is wrong with me. I'm just trying to get changed so I can return to practice."
Much to my surprise, Kova changed his tune. "When you are finished dressing, meet me by bars."
I nodded and quickly changed after he exited the locker room. Before I left, I checked my little white notecard Dad had wanted me to keep specifically in my gym bag. It had all the times I had to take medicine and which ones until I remembered them by heart. I read over it, then pushed my pill bag all the way to the back and locked up my locker.
Kova and I practiced hard together, him instructing me the whole way with any little tips of the trade he could offer. He barked out orders and I took them in silence like a good student. It was just like we'd done from the beginning and I craved that mentally. I'd completely forgotten about the dark cloud that hung over my head while I was in the zone.
"I think you are ready to move forward," he said, rubbing his hands together. The bold optimism in his eyes gave me the courage I was lacking today. There was no way he'd even consider this if he didn't think I’d thoroughly mastered the skill to move on to the next step—adding the full twist. This was huge for me right now.
Maybe I'd been too hard on myself.
"You feel like I'm ready to move on?"
He studied me. "I would never have you move on if I did not have complete confidence in you."
I smiled from ear to ear. If he felt I was ready, then I was ready.
"Okay…but will you spot me?" I asked, adjusting my grips. I needed him, wanted him there as cushion.
"Of course. I plan to be here until you are ready to do it on your own."
Stepping near the low bar, Kova moved to stand in front of me instead of behind me. I looked at him, a little trepidation riling me up. His eyes softened.
"It is only one more half turn. You can do this."
