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"I need you to know something," he said, his voice a touch urgent.
I swallowed, shamelessly rubbing myself on him. My body was pulsing with need. He played my pussy like a violin and made t
he sweetest sounds as I orgasmed. A long moan left my lips. I was so wet that I felt it trickle down his stomach and along my thigh. Kova noticed and growled in approval.
"I think I have loved you after the first week and I did not know it. I do not regret a single day with you. I only wish I had not been so determined to keep you away. I wish I would have just acted on what I felt for you first so we could have had more time together."
He continued touching me. My breathing was labored and my heart raced. Kova slipped his fingers from my pussy and pressed on the puckered hole, and I stilled.
"Inhale." When I did, he said, "Exhale." He pressed a little deeper. "Relax."
He coaxed me to loosen up. I was weak for him, and my entire body was charged with electricity. My clit tingled and I was suddenly awake with craving.
My mouth fell open and I dug my nails into his chest. "You don't resent me for what happened?"
Tears coated my eyes again. I didn't have to say it for him to know what I was talking about.
"Never," he said, appalled I'd ask such a thing. "If anything, it makes me love you more." He drew his knees up and I felt his cock touch the back of my thigh and drive over my ass cheek. My skin heated. "Your strength is what makes you so damn magnetic. Regardless of what happened that night, I do believe it was how it was supposed to be in the end, as much as it hurts to say it."
I nodded, unable to say the words. I knew what he meant, still it didn't hurt any less.
I started to cry. "I was so worried you'd hate me or find me ugly. I didn't think you wanted me anymore, and then I started to get paranoid—"
"Look at me."
"I didn't give you a choice!" I spoke over him, crying a little more. "I wasn't going to give you a choice."
"What?" he asked, confused.
I was so sorry it broke my heart.
I had to get it out.
I was a horrible human.
Kova sat up and took me with him. "Look at me, Adrianna." His eyes were glowing as he looked at me in awe. I sat in his lap, my body shaking as I cried softly. I tried to look away, but he wouldn't let me. Whatever he was going to say, or whatever he was going to do, he wanted me to trust in him.
"I had made up my mind that I was going to get rid of our baby and then I lost it." I hiccupped. "I didn't even ask you what you wanted. I'm so sorry. God, I'm so sorry."
Kova grabbed my chin and pulled it forward to press a peck to my lips. He pulled back and I drew in a shaky breath. He looked into my eyes, then kissed me the same way again.
"Sometimes you talk too much," he said quietly against my mouth. "You worry too much too."
I inhaled another shaky breath. I frowned. I was so confused.
"I am not mad." He planted another kiss. "I could never resent you." Two kisses. "I understand why," Kova said honestly, and it shattered my heart even more. "The miscarriage is not your fault, and as for the abortion, your decision was the right one. That does not mean I did not want our child, it was just not the right time for us, Adrianna. That is all. Nothing more, nothing less. Please, for me, stop making yourself sick over it. We do not need to keep discussing it."
Tears streamed from the corner of my eyes. I shook my head. "But how come you don't say anything about it? Why don't you even look sad?"
A shadow crossed his eyes. "Because I see how you are dealing with it and I am not adding to your sadness. The truth is, the whole thing"—he swallowed thickly—"fucking kills me, Ria. You have no idea what it does to me and what we lost. I am wrecked inside."
Kova took my wrists and guided them over his shoulders. He brought me closer to him then reached between us and palmed his length. His erection moved over my overstimulated clit. Always eager for him, I lifted my hips for Kova to push into me. My lips parted and our eyes met as he pushed all the way in. I sighed. Kova held still and so did I. His nostrils flared and I held my breath. We didn't move.
A moment later, he brushed a lock of hair behind my ear, and said, "If I felt any of those negative ways about you, would I still want to make love to you? Would I sell my gym? I am willing to go against your father for you. Truth is, I would do anything for you, Ria. I would probably kill for you, that is how much I fucking love you." He thrust in and growled. He was so hot inside of me, burning me up. "You always told me actions speak louder than words. Now that I am finally making moves, you question it."
I closed my eyes, feeling guilty.
"No, look at me. You want to know what I feel and how I am dealing, look at me when I tell you."
