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I purse my lips together and look back at him. "No, definitely not. But when there isn't anyone too thrilled about it rallying behind you, it kind of takes the joy out of it."
He nods in understanding. "You should know that I was serious that night when I said I w
ould make a donation. Yeah, I was just trying to find a way to get to you too, but I meant what I said. Whenever you're ready, just let me know."
"James, I can't take a donation from you."
"Why not?"
"Because that's mixing business with pleasure and that never works out well."
His eyes glimmer. "Sometimes that can make for the best recipe."
I laugh nervously. "Yeah, said no one ever."
He squeezes my thigh again. "Give it some thought. My firm picks two charities a year, and I'd like to make yours one of them."
I swallow back the knot in my throat. "Why did you want to see me today?" I ask, changing the subject. I'm not ready to have a conversation like that just yet. Mainly because I can't tell if he's actually supportive or if it's just a way to keep us together after our time is up.
He sighs deeply and looks ahead. "Work. It's been a stressful week. I love being a lawyer, there’s something new and exciting all the time, but some days it just gets to me, you know? Especially when people need direction over every little fucking task. We have some attorneys fresh out of law school who feel entitled to everything, some seasoned but utterly fucking clueless. I'm not going to baby them, but fuck, I wish they'd use their heads and think before asking a question. I'm trying to prepare for a case coming up that can take my firm to the next level. I don't want to be bothered every second of the day."
I pat his chest, then rub it soothingly. "Try not to take it too personal. You have to remember you were once a novice too and probably were the same way, even though I'm sure it would kill you to admit that." He looks down at me and smirks. "Anything I can do to help?" I say.
"Have dinner with me tonight?"
Leaning in, I give him a peck. "I can't. I'm sorry. I have plans with Natalie," I lie. "But what about this weekend?"
His face falls a little and I feel bad, but I can't cancel on Daniel again.
"I have a place out east I use when I need to get away. Come stay the weekend with me. Friday night to Sunday night. Just me and you and we can do and go anywhere you want."
My brows lift in surprise. "You mean you don't want me naked and willing all weekend at your mercy? My, James, I'm slightly offended."
He chuckles. "Well, I'm sure I'll have you on your back at some point… But I just need to be around you." He lowers his voice. "You're a ray of light for me, Aubrey. I see things differently, clearer. Things I want, things I need to change. I don't feel stressed when I'm with you. I feel a sense of relief. I feel like I can fucking breathe again."
I smile, though something inside my chest tightens and I can't figure out what it is.
"Better yet, let's go to Aspen for the weekend," he suggests.
"What?" I laugh, a little nervous. "Where did that come from?"
He shrugs. "I have a place there too. We can go skiing and then sit in front of the fire at night."
A huge smile spreads across my face. "Why did I instantly think of an old Harlequin romance book cover?"
We both laugh and he gives me a little nudge.
"What do you say? Come away with me." He doesn't beg, but I can hear the plea in his tone. I want to give in to him. It's too easy with him and I forget I have to be careful.
The temptation to be alone with James all weekend is strong. I want to go, but I hate lying to everyone I care about. But the way my body is craving to be with just him, I realize it’s worth it for me.
"I've never been skiing before," I say quietly. "We might have to use the bunny slope."
"Whatever you want, as long as I can have you to myself all weekend."
Glancing at James, I nod. Our eyes lock, and I feel myself weakening further. I know he sees it, because I can see the same feeling mirrored in his eyes.
My heart is in danger. His heart is in danger. I realized it months ago when we met, which is why I tried to put distance between us, but something as simple as spending a half hour in a little coffee shop solidifies it.
