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"All the fucking time, Aub. Some days my chest hurts and I have to tell myself to stop being a little bitch. I can't even walk down the street without looking for him."

I feel sad that she's longing for this guy. "Really? How did I not know this?"

"I don't talk about it because what good is that going to do? I can't have him. End of story. I have to keep telling myself that any relationship formed inside the walls of Sanctuary Cove is doomed from the start."

I swallow. She has a point, and I don't like it.

"But if there was a chance you could have him, would you?"

Taking a deep breath, she says, "That man is what I compare all other men to. If there was some wicked way it could work, I'd ride his ass all the way to the courthouse and sell my soul just so he could love me for the rest of my life."

My brows raise. I have no words. None. This is a side of her I've never seen before and it makes me feel bad because I know the feeling. It forces me to compare the two men in my life, and how I would give up just about anything to be with only James.

"There's a client like that for you, isn't there?"

My stomach tightens with anxiety. "Kind of." I look out the window, nervous to talk about this. "I get this feeling in my chest when he’s around that I can’t explain. The way he talks to me, touches me…" My face falls a little, and I lower my voice. "He makes me forget it’s only a job."

Natalie sits up and looks directly into my eyes. Her blue gaze is resilient, and I know she's going to really drive home what she's about to tell me.

"Break it off now, Aubrey. I'm serious. It's easy to get lost in the façade. Trust me, speaking from experience, you don't want to fall down that hole."

I study her. She wants me to listen, and really listen good. The problem is, it's too late for that, and I already know it.

Natalie takes a sip of her mixed drink and then a drag of what's left of the blunt. Blowing it out, she looks at me again and says, "Well, that escaladed quickly."

Fifty-Two

"Your phone’s ringing," Daniel says from my living room.

I walk over with a bowl of popcorn. "What does it say?" I ask as I sit down.

"Blocked caller."

I look back and forth between his eyes in a panic. I swear I’m going to have heart failure by the time I'm twenty-five.

"Probably a telemarketer," he says. "I wouldn't answer it. I've been getting a lot of those lately."

Exhaling a stiff breath, I agree with him and reject the call, then I place the phone face down and on silent. I've ignored quite a few calls from James since last night. I feel bad about it, but I need to put a little distance between us. For my sanity…and heart. After he told me he finally had a reason to leave his wife, I haven't been the same. It makes me want things with him that will never happen. A sick fantasy and nothing more.

"Wanna watch The Notebook?"

I look at Daniel with skepticism and sit back. "Are you for real right now? Why the hell do you want to watch that? Do you have a secret crush on Ryan Gosling? Because newsflash, he's taken, and with a baby, and that baby mama is hot," I say, and he grins.

Daniel chuckles and wraps an arm around my shoulders. "I don't, but I just thought you might. It's a chick flick. Doesn't every girl want to watch that?"

My head tilts to the side. "That's sweet of you, but I need something funny after being with my grammy."

He cups my jaw and gives me a little kiss. His eyes soften. "Still feeling down after seeing her?"

I nod, my lips a thin, flat line. Grammy's coloring was much better, and while that makes me feel a little better, I can't help but think the worst since she's still in the hospital. She's antsy to get out, and I feel the same way for her. I want her back in her home with her cats where I know she's safe.

"They're still running tests. How many can they possibly be running?"

"A hospital isn't going to release a patient without covering every inch of the floor. If they don't, that's a malpractice suit waiting to happen."

Makes sense. "They found something in her lungs," I say quietly. "They're going to do some pulmonary tests."

Daniel tips my chin up and looks into my eyes. "Hey now. That test can be used for something as simple as allergies. Don't get all worked up, and do not look shit up on the internet."

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