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I can't help it but burst out laughing. That was the last thing I expected to hear. New Yorkers are known for their animated and blunt attitudes. There's a uniqueness about them, a seventy-thirty blend of take-no-bullshit attitude and humor in their words.
She raises her brows and I respond to her questioning look. "I'm sorry. I've just never done this before and I found that funny."
She purses her lips together and they twitch with entertainment. "Oh, this is gonna be fun. I'll go light and start with your arm pits, brows, and upper lip. Then we move onto the goods."
The technician prepares her supplies, and then waxes the three places she mentioned pretty quickly. My top lip is a little sensitive and hurts the most. There's a slight burn but nothing too bad. I do love the idea that I don't have to shave under my arms now.
"You mind if I shape your brows? You could use it," she says like they offend her.
I just nod. What do I care? She plucks pretty quickly and even uses some string that looks like floss.
"Oh, Aub, they're looking good," Natalie says, impressed, and leans over to inspect them.
I give her a thumbs up. I'm not really sure how to respond to that.
"There's a nice arch now and they're thin. Not huge, overgrown bushes."
"Hey now, I didn't have bushes."
Her eyes bore into mine. "You had more hair above your eyes than I do on my pussy when it grows in."
"Hmmm… It's true." The technician agrees with her.
They weren’t that bad. I tweeze them, I just don’t know how to shape them.
The technician hands me a mirror and I look at them.
"Okay, fine." The shape gives my face a totally different look. "They look good. Better," I say, and the woman glares around the mirror at me. "They look fucking amazing and I feel like the ugly duckling that just turned into a swan," I amend.
"Good." She moves to stand at the end of the table. "Now, pull your knees up and put your feet here like you're at t
he gyno." She guides my feet to the sides. "Yes. Now let your legs fall open."
A twinge of embarrassment heats my cheeks.
"We’ll start with your ass."
I slam my knees shut. "My ass?"
"We're waxing that ass too." Natalie smiles at me.
"For what? No one goes back there."
"When that ass is in the air, and men look at it wanting to fuck it, you want it looking good. You don’t want them to see a hairy jungle. It’s about to be your second-best feature. Now open up and pull your knees back like you're about to give birth, and let the woman do her job."
What the fuck? I'm at a loss for words. I've been around the block a few times, but I've never had any complaints about how my ass looks when it’s in the air.
"You’re such a bitch," I say to Natalie. "You love to see me tortured, don’t you?"
Exhaling a sigh, I do as she says, even though I feel extremely exposed. This is probably tame compared to what my new job will entail. Based on what Natalie tells me, anything is possible.
"If there's an award for being the worst best friend, you win it," I say.
She's standing behind me and I can hear her trying to stifle her laughter. "This is another moment you would’ve run from had you known what was waiting for you."
I angle my neck to look back at her. "Do you see the position I'm in? Not even my gynecologist gets this up close and personal with me."
"Get used to it." Natalie lifts her chin toward the technician. "She’s gonna be up close and personal with your goodies often."
