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I couldn’t lie to her. What would one more be, to be honest? But she would see through this lie. It was the only reason I had to tell the truth, which was saying something about how far this had gone, but that was another worry for another time.
“What’s going on, Scar?” Lily asked.
“I think it’s a stomach bug.”
Lily raised her eyebrows. “For three weeks? No bug lasts that long.”
I shrugged. “I’m going to make tea. Hopefully, that will stay down. Do you want something?”
“No, thank you,” Lily said, but she followed me to the kitchen where I put on the kettle. “Are you pregnant?”
I froze and swallowed hard before I turned around.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said. “How long have we been playing this game with boys? I think I can handle myself by now.”
Lily didn’t laugh at my attempt at a joke. Shit, she was serious.
“You know that I’ll support you if you are,” Lily said. “I’m worried about you. You keep to yourself so much now, and you’re never this sick. This looks a lot like a baby to me.”
I shook my head and took a cup out of the cabinet for myself.
“Are you sure I can’t get you anything? I bought fruit tea the other day. It’s pretty good.”
“Don’t change the subject,” Lily said. I knew where she got her serious attitude from. Evan was just like that–to the point.
I sighed. “I’ll go get it checked out, okay? I’ll go to a doctor, but I know it’s probably going to be a digestive thing. Or a parasite.” Like a baby. “I’ll probably get antibiotics or something.”
Lily narrowed her eyes at me. “You can’t skip out on it,” she said.
I chuckled. “Yes, Mom.”
“I still think you’re pregnant,” Lily said.
I shook my head. “I’m pretty sure I would know if I’m pregnant,” I said. “You know, periods and everything.”
“You’ve been regular?”
Thank God, she’d asked it right. I’d been very regular. I was having a baby, so I didn’t have my period, too, but that still counted as regular. Right?
“Yeah, nothing wrong with my cycle.” I patted myself on the back for my diplomatic answer.
Lily looked at me, and I blinked, trying not to look as guilty as I felt. I was still lying to her in a way, and I hated lying to Lily. She was my best friend, and she didn’t deserve this. She didn’t deserve any of it–not me lying to her or sleeping with her dad or carrying her siblings.
“I still think something’s up,” Lily said.
I groaned. “I said I would go to a doctor,” I said.
“I mean with you being different. I can’t put my finger on it, but I know you. And this isn’t you.”
My stomach turned. She was right, of course. It was all the lies and sneaking around that did it, but there it was.
“I’m going,” Lily said.
“That’s it?” I asked. “That’s all you came to say to me?”
“My lunch break is pretty much over. I came to check on you because I feel like you’re so far away I can’t reach you. I was right, too, wasn’t I?”
I didn’t answer her. Of course, she was right. That was Lily, strong and confident and almost always right.
“I’ll talk to you later,” she said when I didn’t respond. She left my apartment, seeing herself out and closing the door behind her. I sank to the kitchen floor when she was gone. This was getting harder and harder to hide. What was I going to do when I was starting to show? And with three babies inside me, that was going to be a lot sooner than if I only carried one.
I was in trouble.
I got in bed and slept for the rest of the day. I was so damned tired. It was a thing, apparently. Pregnant women were tired all the time. When I woke up, it was almost dark, and I felt uncomfortable and restless. I couldn’t get into anything on TV. I couldn’t relax. Lily’s words kept going through my mind–are you pregnant? She wasn’t stupid.
If Evan didn’t talk to her soon, she would figure it out by herself, and then we would all be in so much shit. It would shatter our friendship.
I had to talk to Evan about it. I called a cab and made my way to Evan’s house. On the way, I texted him, telling him I was coming. I needed to talk to him. This wasn’t about sex at all, but he’d known earlier that I wasn’t okay. He would want to talk, too. He was just as good at reading me as Lily was. Apparently, it was impossible hide anything from the Burkes.
Being pregnant also made me emotional. I wanted to cry. Everything felt too big for me. My stomach hurt, and I felt uncomfortable in my clothes. They were scratchy on my skin.
