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Fifteen minutes later, I go back up to bed to find the room in darkness, lit only by the lamps. Nathan is shirtless in bed. I can see every muscle in his torso and shoulders.
His big blue eyes meet mine across the room, and my stomach flutters.
What the fuck is going on?
“I’m going to take a shower.” I fake a smile.
With a racing heart, I put my hair up in a top bun and get under the water. I have it so hot that it tingles my skin.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
I shower and brush my teeth, and I put on the pretty pink nightdress that Nathan’s parents bought me for Christmas before I walk out.
Nathan’s eyes lift from his book, and he watches me get into bed.
I wonder has he turned the page yet?
I get in and pull the blankets up. Nathan rolls onto his side toward me and leans up onto his elbow.
We stare at each other, and something hangs in the air between us.
Longing…
I’m longing for him to touch me again, and I want to stand up and take off my nightdress.
I want him to see me. I want him to want me.
Where the fuck is this coming from?
Nathan’s dark eyes drink me in. His stare is hungry, wanting, and eventually he whispers, “Have you ever wanted something so badly that you can taste it?”
Goosebumps scatter up the back of my neck.
“Like you might just fucking die, if you don’t get it,” he breathes.
My heart begins to race.
What’s he talking about?
I stay silent.
He cups my face in his hand and stares down at me. His thumb dusts over my bottom lip for the second time tonight, and my heart feels like it stops.
“Say something,” he whispers.
My eyes search his, but I have no words. I have to be reading this wrong.
He doesn’t like women.
“What do you want me to say?” I whisper.
He stares at me for a moment, and then his brow furrows. Without another word, he flops back onto his pillow and exhales heavily. “Don’t worry about it.”
We stay silent for a few minutes until, eventually, he rolls over and turns his back to me.
I watch him, unsure what to say. You could cut the air between us with a knife. It’s thick with tension, filled with angst.
“Goodnight, Eliza.” He sighs.
