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“Crap,” she snaps.
“How did you go last night?” Joshua smiles at the girls but continues his conversation with Cameron.
Cameron shakes his head. “I went to bed with a ten and woke up with a two.” Everyone laughs. “I’m not joking, man. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough when I woke up this morning. I left my fucking shoes there.”
Joshua laughs out loud. “What was so bad with her?”
“It was total false advertising. When a girl bats her eyelashes at me, I kind of expect them to be real. She must have been really good with the makeup shit because the girl I went to bed with looked nothing like the monster I woke up with.” He scrubs his hand over his face and does a fake cold shiver.
Adrian winces. “I hate to break it to you, but those beer goggles you had on last night didn’t help.” Cameron screws up his face and nods with his eyes closed.
“Oh my god!” Cameron yells way too loud. “How big were that dude’s balls last night telling Tash to think of him when she had sex?” Everybody, including myself, laughs out loud. I do have to admit it was pretty ballsy.
“That fucker is going to die next time I see him,” Josh says deadpan.
Bridget walks over to Adrian and affectionately cuddles him. “Thanks for getting me home safely.” He smiles and kisses her temple. “No worries, baby.”
“Abbs, what went on with those two guys last night fighting over you?” Cameron asks as he makes his way over to the fridge. Joshua has now settled in between my legs as I sit on the edge of the bench. He discreetly pulls my hips towards his groin and gives me a sly smile. I do wide eyes at him. “Stop it,” I mouth. Abbie rolls her eyes.
“What? Tell me what happened?” I ask, the shock in my voice evident.
Abbie scrubs her face with her hands. “Number four challenged number one.”
I narrow my eyes at her. “Who won?”
“Army guy,” Bridget chimes in.
“So what number is he now?” I ask, confused.
“One. Definitely one,” Abbie snaps.
Cameron frowns as he opens his bottle of water with his back to the girls but facing Josh and me.
“How many do you have?” Cameron asks as he makes eye contact with Josh and takes a drink of his water.
“A few,” Abbie answers. Cameron smiles and raises his eyebrows at Josh. Josh glares at him and mouths the word “No.” Cameron smiles and shrugs as he goes back to his position on the lounge. Hmm, that was an interesting exchange—is Cam interested in Abbie? I’ll have to remember to ask Josh later. Everybody goes into the lounge room and flops onto the chairs as they start to reminisce about last night’s shenanigans. Joshua leans in and lifts my chin to give me a gentle kiss and I put my arms around his neck and breathe in his beautiful scent. He always smells so frigging hot.
“Oh god!” Cameron yells in that damn tequila voice. “They’re all kissy and shit.” Everyone’s eyes shoot back to us on the bench.
“I went to bed with a ten and woke up with a twelve. Why wouldn’t I be kissy?” Joshua snaps as he leans in and kisses me again. I smile into his face. This man really is all kinds of wonderful.
We walk into the reception venue and Joshua goes over to look at the seating arrangements. The church service was beautiful and thankfully short. I don’t know many people. Alyssa and I went to university together but have not mixed much since. It’s one of those weddings that you go to because you have to. It would be rude not to attend. However, in hindsight, Josh’s offer of a hot date does seem like it would have been a better option. He has done well so far and has managed a few strained conversations with people. I can’t believe I didn’t know he was shy, is he shy or is he just rude and not wanting to talk to people. Who knows? I haven’t quite worked that one out. He points toward a table in the middle of the room and we go and take our seats. Joshua looks edible of course in a navy suit, white shirt and grey tie. I am wearing a black draping dress. I had planned on wearing a pale pink tight dress but my bloated tummy made me feel too uncomfortable in it and I hate being self–conscious when things are too tight. To Josh’s amusement our table guests have all started arriving. All eight single girls of them. Is this a set–up? I’m here with the most gorgeous man on the planet and we are seated with eight single girls. I can see their eyes light up as he introduces himself to them. I don’t see any sign of shyness now, prick. The chair next to him is still empty and a blonde in a white lace dress comes over to our table. Shit. She is stunning and equipped with the best set of boobs I have seen. They are hanging out—the dress is damn near indecent. Didn’t she get the memo about not wearing white to a wedding? The rude bitch. She makes eye contact with Joshua and puts out her hand.
“Hi, Tatiana Richards,” she purrs. I roll my eyes, Tittiana more like. Joshua shakes her hand and introduces himself and turns and smiles at me.
“What?” I roll my eyes.
“Maybe this wedding won’t be as boring as I thought.” He smiles at me with a twinkle in his eyes. I fake smirk at him. The thing is, I know he’s trying to make me jealous and guess what? It’s working. She introduces herself to everyone on the table and they all start their usual crap talk. Josh runs his hand up my thigh. “Do you want another drink, baby?” He leans in and kisses me underneath my ear.
I smile. “No thanks.” I have to remember to not show him any sign of my unease. There is nothing worse than an insecure girlfriend. I know, I counsel their boyfriends all day long.
“So, Joshua, I’m a social network analyst. What do you do?” Tatiana purrs.
His eyes light up and he smiles. “I design software.”
“Really.” She smiles and she puts her hand on his forearm. “What a coincidence that we should be seated together.” Oh get off it, you stupid bitch, social network analyst my ass. Anybody can count how many likes they get on their selfies. Joshua moves his arm away from her grip and he grabs my hand under the table. I try to calm my jealousy; she is so making a play at him. “Are you American?” she asks.
He shakes his head. “No, Australian living in America.”
