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I roll my eyes. “Josh, you have to buy a suit that you only wear twice in your life.”
He frowns in question.
“You wear it on the day you get married and then on the day you get buried.” I smile at the wonder on his face.
He smiles softly as his eyes hold mine. “I want to be married. I want this to be legal.”
I melt. “Oh god, me too. I have never wanted anything so much,” I whisper.
He stands with new purpose. “Ok, Miss Marx, good distraction tactics. Let’s go get some wedding rings and that suit I am only going to wear twice in my life.”
When I told my man that I wanted to go shopping I had no idea he knew how to execute my idea to damn perfection. We are in a luxury shoe store and I am tottering around on the most ridiculously high stilettos known to man. Joshua is sitting on a velvet chair in full control and directing me as to which ones he wants me to try on.
His dark eyes watch me in my short black dress. I wore it purposely to keep the blood from the brain in his head detoured to the brain in his dick… Distraction 101… I got this shit sorted.
“Turn around,” he whispers as his eyes drop to my legs. I turn to see the much anticipated neck crack in the mirror as he watches me from behind and I bite my lip to stifle my smile as I look down at the shoes.
“Yes, we will take those.” He nods to the sales clerk and she adds it to the other ten boxes on the counter. The four shop assistants’ tongues are literally hanging onto the floor as they watch Mr Orgasmic with his bottomless credit card in full throttle action. They are running around trying to please him and are deep green with envy. I hate to admit it but I am loving every minute of this. These shoes are ridiculously expensive and not something I would ever buy but you know what? I don’t care because this is keeping his mind off things and he has the money, so why the hell not?
His eyes scan the shop again and I feel my cheeks heat as I start hearing the word Kardashian run though my head. “That’s enough baby.” I frown, suddenly embarrassed.
He stands and smirks at me, knowing exactly what’s going through that peabrain of mine, and he casually throws his arm around my waist. “We haven’t started yet, my beautiful girl.”
I smile and my eyes flick to the sales girls on the other side of their desk who are all melting right alongside me. Unable to help myself, I smile broadly.
“Let’s go get those wedding rings,” he murmurs as he slides his credit card across the glass countertop.
“Ok,” I whisper. I lean up and kiss him gently on the cheek as he pulls me into him, then he heads out the door to talk to Ben briefly. My eyes, and those of the sales assistants, follow him across the shop and I feel a wave of affection sweep over me. Their eyes flick back to me and they seem embarrassed at me catching them checking out my man.
“I know, right,” I smile.
The blonde girl smiles in relief and shakes her head at me. “You are one lucky lady. When do you get married?”
I smile at her honesty. “Three months,” I reply.
She smiles warmly at me. “You make a lovely couple.”
“Thank you.” I beam. You betcha, baby, and he’s all mine, so eyes off the merchandise.
“Yes,” Joshua answers his phone. We are in the back seat of the car on our way home after buying wedding rings, and Ben is driving. That did not go down as I had expected. I had thought we would go into a jewellery shop on the street, peruse glass cabinets and pick out rings from the display but, no, I keep forgetting. We are in Stanton Land now, a land where luxury is mandatory, expected and delivered on a silver tray with champagne, much to my delight. We went to a plush high-rise office and mirrored cabinets on wheels were rolled out to our leather seats while we drank champagne out of crystal glasses. We were shown ‘exclusive pieces‘ as they called them. This was the master jeweller’s office that had made my engagement ring for Joshua. I smile as I watch him. When we came back here for that week to pick out a new house, Joshua had consulted the master jeweller and he had made for ring for me in a rush so Josh could give it to me before our expected return two weeks later. I feel regret knowing the pain I put Joshua through in that week when I lost my father. I frown at my thoughts and my eyes fill with tears. I turn away to stare out the window. I know a thing or two about deep pain. Dad, I miss you. Where are you now? A lump in my throat forms as I contemplate how sad my wedding day will be when he is not the one who will be walking me down those steps to the altar and telling me I look beautiful. He won’t be the one to be giving speeches and he won’t see how happy I am. He won’t be welcoming Joshua to our family. My eyes close in pain—I hate this. Why did you have to die? It’s not fair that y
ou left me when I needed you the most. Joshua grabs my hand across the backseat and my eyes flick to him. He frowns as he speaks on the phone as he senses my inner turmoil. My cloudy eyes flick back out the window. If only I could turn back time and if we only knew Dad had a heart problem, we could have saved him. My thoughts go to Brock, a beloved brother who I have lost contact with. We have hardly spoken since Dad’s death. You hear of families breaking up and you never once think that it will happen to yours. I need to make this right with him. I need to make him see how happy I am. Out of all of this nightmare with Joshua and his family, one thing has become blaringly obvious to me. Family is the most important thing in life and I want what’s left of mine to be happy and united. I need to fix this so I’m ringing Brock as soon as we get home.
Joshua hangs up, undoes his seatbelt and slides over next to me. He puts his arm around me and pulls me into him and my tears drop onto his suit. No words are needed between us; he knows the only reason I get sad. He knows it’s the only thing he can’t fix in my world. If he could, I know he would. He gently kisses my forehead and stays silent. The sad truth is my wedding day is going to be the happiest day of my life but it will also be one of the saddest days in my life and there is not a thing that we can do about it. I imagine all brides must feel like this when they have lost a parent.
After ten minutes I pull back and wipe my eyes. “Sorry,” I whisper as I shake my head. What’s happening to me? “We just bought wedding rings. I should be happy.”
He smiles gently as his eyes hold mine. “Don’t ever apologise to me for being emotional. It’s the emotion in you that I love.”
I smile softly and kiss him as I grab his jaw and run my thumb backwards and forwards through his stubble as my eyes search his. “I love you,” I whisper, grateful for this beautiful man who knows me so well.
He smiles. “I know you do.”
“I don’t mean to be sad,” I whisper into his neck.
“I know you don’t.” He smiles and picks up my hand and kisses the back of it. “We can go home—the house has been cleared and the detectives have given us the go ahead,” he replies.
I nod. “Oh.” For some reason I feel slightly dejected. I wanted another night in our hotel room with just the two of us. Maybe he’s right and we should move to an apartment somewhere for a while.
