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For the next two days, I scour the job listings and respond to ads. I only succeed in getting turned down for jobs as an office assistant, a receptionist, and even as a waitress. At night, alone in my room I succumb to the weariness, heartache, and the pain that thinking of David brings, but I can’t stop thinking about him. I can’t stop aching for him, wanting him, torturing myself with wondering if he cares that I’m gone.
After three days, I still haven’t found a job. After exhausting all the leads from the job listings, I return to the hotel, tired and painfully aware that I have to find something really soon.
I haven’t been in my room for five minutes when there is a knock on the door. I haven’t ordered any room service, so even before I go to look through the peephole I already have a dreadful suspicion in the pit of my stomach. Yet the sight of David standing outside my room knocks the breath out of my chest. My stomach tightens as a mixture of feelings assault me, confusion, longing, regret, and an overwhelming desire.
I’m not going to open the door.
“Sophie.” His voice is gentle, as if he knows I’m just on the other side.
I step back, heart pounding, desperate to get away from the sound of his voice and the temptation that comes with it. What is he doing here, what does he want?
“Sophie, I know you’re in there.” He says. “Open the door.”
I take a deep breath. I don’t know why he’s here, but it doesn’t change anything. It’s doesn’t mean that his feelings about our relationship have changed. There’s no
reason to let myself get affected by his presence, and there’s no reason to be afraid of talking to him.
I open the door.
And my heart tightens in my chest.
I love him.
Just looking at him. I want to cry. I want to forget everything that’s happened and let him hold me. I devour the familiar planes and angles of his face, the piercing blue eyes, wavy black hair, sensual lips that I’ve kissed a hundred times.
This has always been about sex.
The memory of his words mock me, and I step back before I let myself be overwhelmed by my desire for him.
He steps inside the room, his tall frame dwarfing the small space. Compared to his apartment, it’s little more than a shoebox, but it’s not so different from my old apartment in Ashford.
His blue eyes turn in my direction, scorching my face, so intense, that I almost lose myself. His brow creases in a frown. “You can’t keep staying here.” He states.
I stare at him, barely able to process the fact that he’s actually trying to dictate to me, even now. Anger overcomes any longing I feel for him.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, only managing to keep my emotions in check.
“I’ve been trying to find you for two days Sophie.” He takes a deep breath. “Did you think I was going to let you just disappear? Steve was waiting outside to take you anywhere you wanted, but you never came out. I was worried. You weren’t in the apartment...” He stops and runs a hand through his thick hair. “Why didn’t you go back to Ashford?”
Go back to Ashford. I’m sure your little boyfriend will be more than eager to find you a place in his bed.
I close my eyes against the memory of his words. He really expected me to go back. Did he really believe that Eddie was waiting for me in Ashford, or did he say that just to be cruel?
As if, I could ever choose any other man over him.
I fold my arms over my chest in a defensive movement. “I always had plans to move here.”
“Yes, I remember.” the gentleness disappears from his voice, “but I didn’t think you would do so even though you have no job, no friends, nothing waiting for you here.”
“Why do you care?” I retort, “It’s none of your business.”
“On the contrary, it’s very much my business.” He sighs and draws in a deep breath. “You may have a very short memory, but let me remind you that you’re still my wife.”
For how long? I think mutinously. For all I know he’s already working on dissolving our short marriage.
“Be reasonable Sophie.” He continues more gently. “You can’t stay here. It’s a dump, and it’s not safe.”
I wish his voice didn’t affect me so much. “Just leave me alone, David.”
