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To offer forgiveness.
Or maybe she’s so used to people judging the shit she’s been through that she’d never think of judging me for my own.
Okay. Yeah. Whatever.
I owe her the rest.
“My ex,” I force out two bitter words. “Katelyn. She was a wreck, Felicity. Went beyond wild child and into recklessness tornado. Dangerous drinking, screwing around with strange men, the works. She was always on the verge of crashing out and I couldn’t deal with it. I had to leave, and I had to take Eli with me for his own safety. I didn’t want to deprive him of his mother, but she wasn’t interested in being a mom till it came to fighting me for custody just to spite me.” It’s been so long I’m not expecting the lump of hot fury in my throat, the way it fucking burns with every breath, but that slim hand on my arm keeps me talking. “It took everything I had. Hours of my life. Every penny. All the money I’d set aside for the mine, just to fight her in court so I could keep my boy.”
“So you had nothing left for the mine,” she prompts quietly.
“Not a goddamned dime. But Gavin already sunk his half into new machinery. We found one thinning vein, thought it might be our lifesaver. I took out loans, everything I could, to cover my half on the new equipment, but it didn’t matter. Shit went bust.” I shake my head. “We bet it all on black, and came up red. The vein was tapped out. We lost everything, and he’s never stopped blaming me, no matter how much I gave him to pay back what he lost. Even cutting his losses, he just had one bad turn of luck after another, and I guess now he’s come for payback. He blames me for fucking up his life.”
“It’s not your fault!” Felicity says with such sincerity that I want to believe her so much. “You fought for your son with everything you had. Hell...you fought that man over me and my gold. Some things are worth more than shiny rocks, and if he can’t see that, if he can’t see how important your son is to you...that’s his fault. Not yours. And if you paid him back, seems to me like you don’t owe him anything. His mistakes after that are his mistakes. You can’t take other people’s bad luck on yourself, Alaska.” Her smile is so wistful, so sad. “Including mine.”
“I’m not taking anything on I can’t handle. It’s no skin off my nose to help you out a little, Fliss.”
Even if it’s more than that.
I can’t really explain it, but hell.
I want so much to do everything, to be everything she’s needed for so long.
Call it a hero complex.
Call it a school yard crush.
Call it all the crap I’ll never care about because I already care too much for the pretty girl from the coffee shop and her sad blue-violet gemstones for eyes.
It’s like she senses the energy steaming off me.
There’s a subtle hint of retreat, the pressure of her hand on my arm lifting.
Her eyes go distant, shuttering over.
She glances away from me, then asks, “So what happened with the fight then?”
Right. The fight.
“I guess he’s been keeping tabs on me ever since I came back to Heart’s Edge with Eli for the summer,” I say. “Watching me. He saw us hide the gold. He stole two bars. Eli saw him digging around here and told me about it. I followed him, and he got in my face, roaring about how I’m scamming people.” I can’t help a snorting laugh. “Here’s the funny part—he thinks it’s fake. He believes I plated bars with tungsten or something and I’m scamming folks with fool’s gold. He threw it in the goddamned garbage. That’s why I wanted to wait to pick up my Jeep till later. When people are in bed and no one will notice me digging in the trash to get that gold out and bring it back.” I sigh. “I’ve got to find a better hiding place. I’ll get on it tonight. Before he gets out and decides to find out just how fake those bars aren’t.”
She blinks. “What if they are?”
“If they’re what?” I blink back.
“Fake. They could be nickel or steel or something, dipped in gold or—”
“I’m pretty sure they’re real, Fliss.” I smile dryly. “But we can take them in for an assessment if you want.”
“No, not yet.” She shakes her head, and her hand pulls away from me. “Can I borrow your keys?”
I stare at her. “What for?”
“You’re in no condition to be running off hauling around gold bars,” she says firmly. “Look, you need to stay here with Eli. I’ll just tell people I’m doing you a favor and picking up your Jeep. I’ll bring my cousin along to help, and then we’ll have someone to drive both cars.”
