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“There wasn’t really anything for me in there,” I answered. Amazing what accepting the fact that you’ve been played will do for your confidence, I thought, pulling my shoulders back.
Jacob looked confused, then laughed. “I invited you.”
“You invited a lot of people, it seems. Every athlete at Harton and some arm candy to match.”
“No— it’s hype night. Most of the teams have some sort of regional or game or contest coming up this weekend, so we all go out, get a little drunk, take the edge off with plenty of time to recover before we’re on.”
“And the arm candy?” I asked, folding my arms.
“They’re here for the athletes,” Jacob said, grinning wolfishly.
“Yeah. Not my thing,” I said, and started to turn. Jacob caught my arm, not tightly, but firmly enough that I froze and turned back. I looked down at my arm, then his eyes; he seemed to realize he’d overstepped, and the expression he gave was as much baffled as it was apologetic. It was as if no girl had ever done anything but cream in her pants the second he touched her.
He released me.
“I invited you because I wanted to see you again,” Jacob said seriously.
“Ok, sure. But you’re a little too busy with your friends in there to see me, so I guess it just won’t work out.”
“Another night, maybe? Football House is hosting—“
“I’m not really interested in being just another admirer at your parties,” I cut him off. “And I’m not interested in getting in line to suck your dick before games. And I’m not interested in fighting with Piper over any of it. So thanks for the invite, but I think I should go.” I finished this lecture both horrified and pleased with myself— I’d just mentioned blowjobs out loud, which was so not something I would normally talk about to anyone, ever, but I’d also said everything I’d been wanting to say to Jacob since that day in class.
“Wow,” Jacob said after pausing a moment. I wished he’d take a step back— did he realize how imposing his presence was? Probably. It felt like we were being pressed together, and I wanted it to stop, but didn’t want to be the one to crack and create more space between us.
“Wow,” Jacob said again, and rubbed the back of his head.
“What?” I asked.
“It’s just…been a while since someone told me to go fuck myself.”
“I didn’t say that!” I protested.
“You did, in so many words. I’m not mad. It’s just been a while,” Jacob said, sounding amused. “Look, being invited to a party by me is a big deal. I meant it as a compliment. Same way that I meant those tickets.”
“A compliment is telling someone they look nice, not showering them in your own greatness,” I said.
“You look nice. You look great, actually,” Jacob said immediately.
“Oh. Thanks,” I said.
“Do you want to go for a walk?” Jacob asked.
“Now?”
“Do you have other plans?” Jacob asked just a bit sarcastically.
“No, but you do. Hype night,” I said, motioning to the Manhattan behind them.
Jacob shrugged. “There’ll be others.”
I eyed him warily. “I’m still not interested in getting in line to—“
He waved my words off. “Look— walk with me up to tenth street, we’ll turn around, we’ll come back here. Then if you want to go home, go, and I promise I won’t crash your super boring archaeology class again.”
“Anthropology.”
“Sure.”
I studied him, avoiding his eyes since I wasn’t totally certain they wouldn’t lock me in all over again. He still looked solid, strong, someone who couldn’t be moved, but I also saw the rise and fall of his chest, the way he ran his thumb across his fingernails, the way he blinked— the way that despite his stature and reputation and perhaps totally inappropriate attempts at complimenting me, he was human.
“To tenth street, then back,” I agreed.
Jacob grinned, put his hands in his pockets— almost like a show of noble, hands-free intentions— and we started down the street.
8
We walked along in silence for the first few blocks— or at least, I did. Jacob didn’t speak to me, but every few feet someone called his name, or waved, or screamed and cheered for the Harton football team out of a moving car’s window. It wasn’t until we’d made it a fair distance away from the clubs that the streets became quieter— still busy, given that we were in the middle of Atlanta, but in an anonymous, hurried way.
“So. Tell me something about yourself,” Jacob said.
“What do you want to know?” I asked, keeping my eyes straight ahead.
Jacob shrugged beside me, admiring the buildings as he walked along, a king surveying his kingdom. “Well, I know you’re a freshman. You’re Piper’s roommate. You’re not straight out of high school though— you took a gap year?”
“I worked for a year,” I corrected— I wasn’t trying to impress Jacob, so why pretend like my life was glamorous? “As a waitress. To pay for school.”
