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Priceless and yet so painful, because she could never be her mummy. She would have to end this charade. Oh, as far as the courts were concerned, they would stay married. There was no way she would jeopardize his chances of gaining full custody of Rhia, but she couldn’t and wouldn’t live with him anymore. More useless tears spilled out of her eyes, and she made an ineffective swipe at them with her hand. Hard to do with the cannula stuck in the back of it. She followed the line leading out of it and forgot to breathe a moment. There slumped in a chair sat Logan. Head at an awkward angle he was fast asleep, and he looked…
Wow, he looked awful. Was that the suit he’d worn the day of the home visit? Why was he still in that, however many days later? It had to have been days, because he sported an almost full beard on his jaw. Deep purple smudges marred his usually even complexion, and … she sniffed. There was a definite not so pleasant odor in the room. She struggled to sit up, to see him better when a cool hand on her shoulder stopped her.
“Easy there, now, let me help you.” The whispered words came from a Health Care Assistant, Lucy, according to her nametag. The young redhead smiled at her, grabbed the button to work her bed, and Hannah slowly rose in a more upright position. The shift in position made the room spin, and she closed her eyes until the dizziness passed.
“There, is that better? I’ll check with the nurse to see if we can get rid of these.” She touched the tracks under Hannah’s nose and smiled. “The drip will have to stay in for a while until you’re strong enough.”
She glanced across at still sleeping Logan.
“You had that man of yours worried. He hasn’t left your side since you were brought in, and at times I thought he’d get himself thrown out. He’s got a bit of a temper, hasn’t he?” She winked at her, and Hannah croaked a weak confirmation.
“Here, slow sips, lubricate those vocal cords. You’ve been out of it for days now.” She held up a cup with a straw, and Hannah managed a few sucks. Lukewarm water had never tasted so good.
“Days?” she asked. “But I can’t have been. I had a cough and sore throat, that’s all. This doesn’t make sense.”
Lucy sobered, picked up her medical chart at the end of her bed, and ticked something off.
“Well, it might have started off like that, but it developed into pneumonia, and that brought on sepsis. Had your husband not brought you in when he did, it could have been really nasty. As it was, it took a rather aggressive cocktail of drugs to get the sepsis under control, but you’ve been on the mend for the last twenty-four hours or so. Still, he—” She hooked a thumb over her shoulder at Logan. “He still refused to leave, and you know I’m really glad you’re awake, ‘cause he’s starting to smell a bit ripe, if you catch my drift.”
She grinned at her, and clipped the notes back to Hannah’s bed.
“A nurse will be in to assess you properly soon.”
With that she left to let Hannah digest this information overload. At least she now knew why she felt as weak a kitten who’d been run over by a truck and lost eight of her nine lives in the process. It didn’t explain Logan’s continued presence though.
His foot slipped, and Logan jerked awake.
“Fuck, what … you’re awake?” He shot to his feet as though he’d been fired from a cannonball, but that wasn’t what made her heart turn over in her chest. It was the tears in his eyes, and the careful way he grasped hold of her hand, raised it up to his lips and pressed a lingering kiss to it that did her in. His beard felt rough against her skin, and tickled at the same time. A completely inappropriate giggle rose from her chest. Okay, so it sounded more like the squeaky wheel of the janitor’s bucket, currently passing by outside her open door, but Hannah was glad she could produce that much of a sound.
Logan lifted his head and regarded her through narrowed eyes.
“And she giggles. Giggles.” He growled low in his throat, and Hanna
h’s heart missed a few beats, especially as he didn’t look angry. His eyes softened as he looked down on her, and then he perched his butt on the side of her bed, dipped his head and kissed her. It was a mere brush of his lips over hers, gentle, yet oh so tender, as he breathed words she never thought she would hear him say.
“I missed you.” He kissed her again, firmer this time, his tongue demanding entry. The minute she opened for him he swooped in, kissing her with so much heated passion she started to cry again. Logan broke the kiss, swore under his breath, and kissed the tears off her face. That just made her cry harder, and Logan pulled away and scrubbed his hand over his face in a move so achingly familiar, it hurt to see. As per usual he was utterly baffled by her display of emotion, or so she thought, until he swiped moisture off his own face.
“Fuck it, I’m messing this all up. I didn’t mean to make you cry. For the love of God, will you stop doing that, woman. I don’t like it, especially if you’re crying over me. Believe me, I’m not worth it.”
When she didn’t stop, he climbed on the bed, pulled her unto his lap, and held her. It felt so good to be back in his arms that for a few precious moments Hannah allowed herself to think that everything would be all right after all. That they could be a proper little family. Eventually, she managed to pull herself together and pushed away from him. He let her, brows drawn together in a frown, those dark eyes of his assessing her. His jaw clenched, and his hands pulled into fists at whatever he read in her expression.
“You shouldn’t be on here.” She whispered the words, utterly incapable of projecting her voice with any conviction. “It’s against hospital rules, I’m sure.”
“Fuck the rules. I never much cared for them, and I sure as fuck am not going to start now. Jesus, woman, do you have any idea how worried I’ve been over you? Well, do you?” He glared some more, and before she could do as much as shake her head, he continued. “Of course, you don’t, why would you, but for the love of God, don’t you ever, ever, do that to me again, do you hear?”
Hannah found her voice at that incongruous statement.
“Sorry, if my being ill inconvenienced you in any way. Maybe you should have put that into the contract I signed. Wife is not allowed to be ill under any circumstances.” She managed to get off his lap, as she spat those words out.
“What the fuck are you on about?” Logan looked so perplexed, hurt almost at her words, but she refused to take them back, even though she knew she was being unfair.
“You insisted on that damn thing, not me, and it’s irrelevant now anyway. This whole adoption thing could go on for years, with Claudia remaining in a coma, and that’s after we’re granted permanent custody.”
There it was, the real reason why he was here. Even though she knew that, hearing him say it out loud broke her heart into a gazillion pieces. Hannah had never really understood that, had always thought it a cliché, but it sure felt like that right now.
“Of course,” she murmured. “Rhia. It’s always been about her, hasn’t it? I can’t do it anymore. I can’t live a lie, Logan.” There, she said it.
“What on earth are you talking about? Of course, it’s been about Rhia, but you love her, so how is that a lie?”
